Sources:
Alexandra Feodorovna: Diaries and Correspondence, volume 2: Engagement and Marriage, 1894, pages 62 to 64, by George Hawkins, 2023
George Hawkins at Letters and writings of Nicholas II and his family on Facebook
I have previously posted an excerpt from this letter here:
Nicholas's letter of the same day:
Nicholas's reply of the next day:
The letter:
Windsor Castle
May 18th 1894, 12 midnight
My own sweet love, It is your Birthday still a minute or two, so I can yet wish you joy and prosperity. I have longed for you so much all day, and felt happy and yet melancholy at the thought of it being yr. Birthday. Granny and the Aunts raised a glass for Ники dear. I sat between Lord Salisbury and Mr Goschen who never ceased speaking and now the theatre in the drawing room is just over. Duse acted in Locandaria. I am quite thrilled — she is wonderful, so sympathetic that one finds her lovely, what an impression in face and voice and such a soft tone. It was a real treat seeing her, I understood almost all, tho' they spoke so fearfully fast, so don't laugh at the owl with her Italian, you beasty. If I were a man, I could perfectly understand her turning my head — she is delightful and so simple and graceful. Granny spoke afterwards to her when all was over.
This afternoon we went to the review of the Yeomanry wh. was nice and then I drove Sandra in the cart, after which Schneiderlein came and I made Madelaine crimp and do her hair, and I helped, and put flowers in her pretty square dress, she looked so sweet. She had as yet always dined alone.
The weather has been glorious all day, sunny, warm and windy wh. latter made all freeze but I liked it I must say. Aunt Marie Leiningen has come, dear thing, I am so fond of her. Now I must go to bed as I am sitting in my dressing gown, and Madelaine instead of taking down my hair, took the dog for a moment into the courtyard. Que Dieux te bénisse my Ники sweet. Sleep gently and dream sweetly and wake up to-morrow cheerful and joyous. I am looking forward to hearing how you spent this dear day. Thanks so much for having congratulated Miechen from me. Good night my own true love and may His angels keep watch over you now and for ever. Many tender kisses and fervent blessings I shall pray for you. Love is as deep as the sea, and the more one loves, the more one has.
May 19th. Good morning dearie. I have been nearly driven mad this morning, as people have been running into my room the whole time asking questions, it is so perfectly odious. But I am not going out driving with Grandmama, wh. I must say I am glad of, as it takes up so much time.
One of Granny's Ladies has brought a lovely Levre inkstand from her and her Father, so kind. I drove Scheiderlein again this morning. I have unluckily no time for learning anything for her, but I hope in Harrogate.
Your sweet letter has come, tenderest thanks for it. It is again a real sweet one — oh Nicky dear, you are such an angel, so much too good and kind for me, you spoil me. Yes darling, indeed it is bliss to know that at last we have a right to love each other and that these years of trial have ended thus happily. And what a heart full of love you offer, God bless you for it, my beloved One. My whole life I give you in return and the full power of a woman's love. If you only knew what you are to me. I never can thank God Almighty enough for this happiness He has given me, feeling so sure of your true love makes the parting in one day less hard. What I should do without your letters, I don't know.
One of Granny's Maids of Honour has died. I have known her for years, it is too sad. When we were over here in March we saw her, but I left without any of us having said goodbye to her, as her sister was dying. She was unconscious when she came there and died. And now she, poor thing, has died. All who knew her love her, she was such an excellent creature with a very warm heart and with a rough manner. But her life never was a happy one as her mother disliked her and she had much sorrow, so one must be really thankful for her being taken out of this world with all its cares and worrys.
I had tea with the Ladies and we conversed in every possible language under the sun, but before [a page seems to be missing here] Сегодня мы ходили пѣшкомь зъ Итнѣ и Frl. Schneider покупала гобку. She was shocked at this and wishes me only to say разныя вещи. My room looks in a sad state, as the half of my things have been packed up and the rest remain here. My address is: Baroness Starkenburg, Cathcart House, Prospect place, Harrogate, Yorkshire.
But my sweet love I must say Goodbye. With fond love and tender kisses I am My own sweet Nicky dear, yr. Ever loving and truly devoted bride
Аликсъ
God bless you душки I am счастливый (?) in your love.
My next letter will be from Cumberland Lodge and Seihert is my servant and Christle is Louie Aribert's eldest brother. Goodbye love. They give Faust here to-night. Mme Alliani sings Marguerite.
Above: Nicholas and Alix.
Notes: "Owing to the calendar difference increasing by a day from February 29 1900, the correct date is now May 6/19)."
"Que Dieux te bénisse my Ники sweet." = "God bless you my Ники (Nicky) sweet."
"Сегодня мы ходили пѣшкомь зъ Итнѣ и Frl. Schneider покупала гобку" = "We went on foot to Eton and Frl. Schneider bought a robe."
разныя вещи = different things.
душки = darling.
счастливый (?) = happy (?); in correct Russian the feminine form is счастливая, or счастлива for short.
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