Alexandra's letter to Nicholas, dated October 6, 1915, and Nicholas's telegram and letter, dated October 6, 1915

Sources:

Letters of the Tsaritsa to the Tsar, 1914-1916, published by Duckworth & Co., 1923

https://babel.hathitrust.org/cgi/pt?id=inu.30000011396573&view=1up&seq=241&skin=2021

https://www.alexanderpalace.org/letters/october15.html

The letter:

No. 135.
Tsarskoje Selo, Oct. 6-th 1915
My own beloved Treasure,
A cold foggy morning. Have read through the papers, thank God, the news continues being good. I was glad to see, that one already speaks of changing the stamp money, thats good. — P-ss Gedroitz is happily better, the temperature less high. —

We have just returned from town. The school is really charming — 4 stories high so I was carried up, the lift not being ready; a part of the necessary things are at Archangelsk. — Really the girls have made wonderful progress.

I went through all their work-rooms weaving, carpets, embroidery, paintings, where they prepare the dyes and dye the silk threads and stuffs they make out of blackberry. — Our priest officiated the Te Deum. Bark, Khvostov, Volzhin and Krivoshein etc. were there, the later offered us 24,000 Rubles for keeping up the school one year. — Then we took tea at Elagin, — she looks well and thinks of going for a tiny visit to Kiev to see Olga whilst Xenia is away, wh. I find an excellent idea. — In the morning, I had much to do in the hospital. — Sweety, why did Dzhunkovsky receive the "Preobrasentsi" and "Semenovtsi" — too much honour after his vile behaviour — it spoils the effect of the punishment — he ought to have got army regiments. He has been continuing horrors against our Friend now amongst the nobility — the tail brings me the proofs to-morrow — ah no, thats far too kind already to have given him such a splendid nomination — can imagine the filth he will spread in those two regiments and all will believe him. — I am sending you a very fat letter from the Cow, the lovesick creature could not wait any longer, she must pour out her love otherwise she bursts. My back aches and I feel very tired and long for my own sweet One. One keeps up alright, but there are moments when it is very difficult. — When sanitary trains pass do you sometimes have a look to them? Have you gone over the house, where all the small people of your staff work, take Baby with you and that will be a thanks to them for their hard work and serve as an encouragement; have the different officers of yr. staff been invited to lunch on Sundays? — Has the English Admiral arrived yet? — There is so much to do, people to see etc. that I feel mighty tired and fill myself with medicins. How is your health my Beloved? — Are no troops for you to see near Orsha? or Vitebsk? An afternoon you might give up to that? — You think me a bore but I long for you to see more troops and I am sure young soldiers pass by on their way to fill up regiments — they might march pass you at the station and they will be happy. You know our people often have the false idea of not telling you, as it might prevent your habitual drive as tho' one could not often combine all quite well. — What does Paul do of an evening? And what have you settled about Dmitri? — Oh Deary, how I long for you yearn after you both its horrible how I miss you. But I am sure, all seems different now the little man is with you. Go and have the regiment drill before you and let Baby see it too it will be a nice remembrance for you both my sunshine and sunbeam. The letter must leave. — Good bye my very own Huzy heart of my heart, soul of my life — I clasp you tight in my arms and kiss you with ever such great tenderness, gentleness and devotion. God bless and protect you and keep you from all harm. A thousand kisses fr. yr. own old
Wify.

Nicholas's telegram:

Telegram. Stavka. 6 October, 1915.
My heartfelt thanks to you for your dear letter and to our Friend for his greetings. In thought I am always with you. We have both been very busy, replying to telegrams and thanking for congratulations. The weather is good, somewhat calmer. The new is good. Both kiss you fondly.
NICKY.

Nicholas's letter:

Mogilev. 6 October, 1915.
MY PRECIOUS LITTLE BIRD,
My warmest thanks for your loving letter; I am in despair at not having written once since we left, but really I am occupied here every minute from 2.30 to 6. And the Little One's presence takes up part of my time too, for which, of course I am not sorry. His company gives light and life to all of us, including the foreigners.

It is very cosy sleeping side by side. I say prayers with him every night since the time when we were on the train; he says his prayers too fast, and it is difficult to stop him. He was tremendously pleased with the review; he followed me, and stood the whole time while the troops were marching past, which was splendid. I shall never forget this review. The weather was excellent and the general impression astounding.

Life here goes on as usual. Alexey lunched in his room with Mr. Gilliard only on the first day, and after that he begged hard to be allowed to lunch with all of us. He sits on my left hand and behaves well, but sometimes he becomes inordinately gay and noisy, especially when I am talking with the others in the drawing-room. In any case, it is pleasant for them, and makes them smile.
Before the evening, we go out in a car (in the morning he plays in the garden), either into the wood or on the bank of the river, where we light a fire and I walk about near by.

I am surprised at the amount he is able, and wishes, to walk, without complaining of being tired! He sleeps well, as I do too, in spite of the bright light of his lampadka. He wakes up early in the mornings, between 7-8, sits up in bed and begins to talk quietly to me. I answer him drowsily, he settles down and lies quiet — until I am called.

Paul is very charming and modest; we have had some delightful talks. He knows about his wife's letter and is displeased with it.
God bless you, my Sunny, my beloved Wify! I kiss you and the girls tenderly. A. as well.
Always yours
NICKY.

Above: Nicholas and Alexandra with Alexei. Photo courtesy of lastromanovs on VK.

Above: Alexei with Pierre Gilliard.

Above: Grigori Rasputin.

Notes: Alexandra almost always referred to Grigori Rasputin as "our Friend".

lampadka (лампадка) = ikon lamp.

Alix's letter to Nicholas of May 14 (New Style), 1894

Source:

Alexandra Feodorovna: Diaries and Correspondence, volume 2: Engagement and Marriage, 1894, pages 50 to 51, by George Hawkins, 2023

The letter:

No. 14

May 14th 1894

My precious Darling,

Fondest thanks for your dear letter, I received this morning. How terribly sad poor old Aunt Katty's Death. Was it not very sudden? I am glad Hélène was there; how unhappy she must be, but it is lucky she is married. What sorrows this life does bring!

Fräulein Schneider has arrived — mad little woman insists on only talking Russian with me and I stand grinning at her, without being able to understand anything, my memory is so bad. She tried to drum things in to me, she is coming down again in a few minutes and if she asks me them again, oh, dear me!

Wilhelmino Grancy sent me beautiful lilies of the valley they had picked in the woods near Darmstadt.

Now my plans are again changed, instead of going to Walton, Dr Reid is sending me to a bath as my legs ache too much and whilst Granny is away, it is a good opportunity for a cure. Sulphur baths and iron water. It is tiresome as I shall have nothing of Victoria in this way. I fear tho riding was very bad, because they hurt me madly — like awful incessant toothache.

We went for a heavenly drive this afternoon and took our tea with us; it was warm, sunny, and the woods looked too splendid, one longed to be an artist or poet. Oh, sweety, when I see such lovely things it makes me long for you now again as I know you would appreciate it.

To-night again lots come to Dinner, Ambassadors and that sort, it is so tiresome, as the corridor is such a bad place for making cercle in or for getting at those people one wants to speak to. I sat last night near the dear little Bishop and he was most agreeable to talk to, and on the other side, old LG E Comerell, who chattered away about military and naval things and asked me all sorts of questions.

To-day is a great holiday and the Park was swarming with people and little couples in touching attitudes grouped under the trees — they enjoyed themselves immensely I have no doubt. And you had a nice Concert, I am so glad to hear. My beloved Nicky dear, I should like to hold on to one of the swallows passing before my window and flie with them over hill and dale, sea and country to you, my own true love. Such tender kiss I long to press on yr lips and lovely eyes. But I must be my goodbye wish my old sweety. God bless and protect you and keep all sorrows from you. Say something kind to Tienchen from me when you see her, poor thing, will you? Ever yr own deeply loving old girly,

Alix

True unto Death. Yours for ever and ever, sweet Boysy. Love to the first couple. They've received my first Wedding present, a little silver lamp and firm [illegible] too, what do you say to that, :you old cow." The owl kisses you oh so tenderly

Above: Nicholas and Alix.

Alix's letter to Nicholas of May 12 and 13 (New Style), 1894

Source:

Alexandra Feodorovna: Diaries and Correspondence, volume 2: Engagement and Marriage, 1894, pages 45 to 47, by George Hawkins, 2023

The letter:

No. 13

Windsor Castle

May 12th 1894

Милый, дорогой Ники

As I have just a minute to myself I am going to begin my epistle to you. I drove with Granny and Aunt Beatrice. And we took tea at Cumberland Lodge which was very nice. I fear my last letter was very dull and I only hope this one won't be the same.

Georgie and May, Aunt Louise and Uncle Lorne have come for two nights, and there are several strangers coming to Dinner, which I think a great nuisance and not even the young Lord in Waiting to cheer me up — is this not too sad, eh? I feel quite [illegible] and cannot even put on the face you so much like. You old goose, I should like to give you a good... punch, not a kiss, do you hear? I am in a beastly bad humour. I wish the man would not come and light all the candles, it looks as if I were going to give a party. Do you remember how you used to help me putting out my lamps in my little room at Coburg. How I long for those evenings back again — shall we be as dumb when we meet here do you think?

Aunt Marie sent me the photo of us and Caesar, done before the Church, not at all a nice remembrance. How angry we were there, when they dragged us out to be done and just when we had a few minutes only to ourselves before I left. I longed to say such a lot to you, but somehow I could not. The little tear you then gave me is so sweet and I prize it greatly.

May 13th. Good morning sweet One, I have just come from Church, where we heard a most beautiful sermon. It reminded me rather of the old clergy man's at Ernie's wedding. I could have sat there for hours listening to him. I wish I could tell it you all, how that God does not look for the outer form, but for the spirit, the same as people who are devoted to each other do not go by the outer appearance but their hearts, spirits are drawn to each other, that religion is not a thing only in a certain [illegible] or Church but everywhere "God is to be found" that we all have got our duties, sometimes they are only small ones and we think we need not put our whole heart into it and how wrong that is. St John. Chapter IV v 4, that was his text, the woman of Samaria "God is a spirit and they that worship him shall worship him in spirit and truth. As long as we don't understand God's spirit, the laws wh rule nature, we are not his creatures. The spirit of God teaches us how always to draw nearer to him. Taking a decision between right and wrong, your conscience shows it you, it is the spirit within you, that draws you involuntarily to the right, you must not make calculations as to what comes after your decision, but let yr spirit direct you. It is not the decision wh brings you the blessing, but the spirit which you have obeyed in taking it.

Many think that to be near God the places of adoration are where your souls are lifted high above the world by the droning of the organ, the voices rising up in harmony, the momentary inspiration, but the true secret to find God is by the consecration of your whole life and of every little pail of water you must carry on the long and weary road to the well. Christ always does his very, but no matter how small and insignificant the work is, he has to fulfil. He gives his very best teaching to the poor woman of narrow mind conception and narrow, mean surroundings — to her he speaks of the greatest truth, wh. are a secret even for the wise. She sought only for deliverance from her earthly toils and we all how often to get rid of all suffering and worry, this longing of hers he used as a means by which to lead her on to higher vistas of spiritual development. The faithful consecration of our life, doing the smallest duties with all our powers concentrated and with the one wish "to do our very best."

I have tried with Gretchen's help to put down a little of the sermon, but it is almost too difficult and I fear I have not done it clearly, but it can give you some idea at least of what he preached.

This afternoon we are going to St George's Chappel for service and to-day I think the singing will be particularly fine.

Aunt B tried a pair of new ponies to-day and they seemed to go quite nicely, tho' at first they scidadled about. My own sweet One, did our thoughts and prayers meet in Church? How the time flies! Well, I am glad for the one season as it brings the time of our meeting again. My legs are so bad and seem to be swollen again, so I am going to be good and see Dr. Reid — alas, I fear it comes from riding, so I foresee that I shall have to give up that pleasure still for a time — oh, it is such a nuisance and I do enjoy cantering about in this lovely Park so much. The both hands are going to play on the terrace afterwards and then crowds come and listen. I shall listen from the room, as the pleasure of walking is not for me. Oh, Nicky sweet, do you really not get frightened when you think of what a creature is to become your wife, will she not drive you mad? I shall do all in my power to get my legs in order till next year, but it is not so easy, and you who are so fond of walking, oh dear, what can I do?

The post has brought me nothing from you, let's hope to-night a letter may still come, or else I shall be so sad, so sad. Beloved boysy, my thoughts are always with you and I long impatiently for the hour of your arrival. If the weather is fine we must have some fun then/ A. Beatrice was saying that we must go up the river then, wh. would be delightful as I have never done it, and it is said to be so lovely. Sweet one, I must say Goodbye now. God bless you and may his Angels watch over you.

Many a tender kiss

Ever yr deeply loving and devoted little girly

Alix

Above: Nicholas and Alix.

Alix's letter to Nicholas, written May 10 and 11 (New Style), 1894

Source:

Alexandra Feodorovna: Diaries and Correspondence, volume 2: Engagement and Marriage, 1894, pages 36 to 38, by George Hawkins, 2023

The 1,500th post to this blog!

The letter:

No 10

Buckingham Palace

May 10th 1894

My own precious Nicky,

Tho' I have only just written to you, I am sitting down to scrible again, but this letter will only leave to-morrow. I am alone, Christle has gone to his room and Thora is dressing for a dinner to wh she is going to-night, but as we only dine so late, I think the best way of filling up my time is by sitting in a comfortable armchair with the lamp close to me, chattering to you. No, you cannot imagine how it poured when we were out driving, the 2 poor gentlemen who had to ride next to the carriage looked like drowned rats, it reminded me of the day of the wedding, our drive back from the Rosenau. I am sure you remember my beautiful aspect when I afterwards turned up for tea — Sandra's red cap, a red, wet face and blue frozen hands, from driving Caesar without gloves on. You know you deserve a good scolding for remaining up so late at night, tho' it touches me deeply you do it as to write to the old owl, but still I wish you would not — it is not good. Don't think I am preaching because I myself like doing the same, but it is surely a bad habit to get into and one cannot cure oneself of it so quickly later. I want my Darling to look well when he comes here and not thin and pale as I alas have seen him look.

I wish I could remain quietly up here instead of going to Dinner, it is so quiet and peaceful here and I have been trotting about all day long and am rather ramolie in consequence. I pity my neighbours to-night, they will find me more idiotic than ever. Christle brought in rather an extraordinary part of his garments, to have them [illegible] by his sister's maid. Whenever anyone knocked, he died of fright, lest it should be Gretchen who would have been too terribly shocked. Really, boys are funny creatures, well, men I ought to say as he is getting on for 30. But now I must go and dress. Good night my Boysy, sleep well, and may your Guardian angel keep watch over you, my own true love.

It is getting on for 12 and I am sitting in my bedroom in a décolté gown with no jewels on and my hair all down. I look raving mad, but Madeleine has gone to see some friends who seem to have kept her rather long and my gown is laced and pinned and tied at the back so that I cannot possibly undo it alone and am as helpless as a Baby. Well, Dinner was nice, only I have neuralgia in the one side of my face wh is idiotic, but a night's rest will take it away. A. Beatrice forgot to write the sitting list, so Christle and I being the ones in the house had to arrange it, but I think all were satisfied. Naughty Cousins teazed me so, for sitting went to the nice, young Lord in Waiting, and said I had on purpose arranged it so and they thought it too bad that as I did not go to parties, I chattered with young men, too wicked of them. Why should I not choose an amusing neighbour, and as he was the best of the Gentlemen and I the second last lady, we had to sit next to each other. You don't mind that, I am sure, you know yr old Owl does not flirt, one can talk and laugh without doing that, can't one?

Just before Dinner, I received your sweet letter. Bless you for it my Boysy. You cannot think how intensely happy I am to hear from you. I do not understand why you don't get a letter from me, as I write every day. Please thank dear Xenia for her charming letter. Don't let us speak yet about my coming, tho' I should so much like to see your Parents. I honestly would rather not go. To travel there without Ernie would be so unpleasant, belong to him still in one way, don't I, tho' you have got me quite in another [illegible]. Don't make me travel so far again. I feel Imust write you all I feel and you will understand me, my own precious love, won't you? Toria spoke so much about you again, how fond she is of you. I am sure you must also be very devoted to her, dear girl. It is such a pleasure like that hearing so much about you, as otherwise I have no one to speak about you too — she knows you best. She is going to lend me some books your dear old Priest gave her. I do wish I could see more of her, and hear like that more about my love. She wore the lovely bracelet you have her. I am glad you have had such a friend all these years and I hope I will never stand in the way of your friendship — friendship is such a lovely rare thing that one must not loose it for anything. "Freundschaft macht die Menschen Gottes Engeln gleich etc." What a noble, fine, utterly unselfish character hers is. Anyone whom you love is doubly dear to me, for they must be worth loving if you care for them.

But now, I really must be off to bed. Good night again. God bless you. "Almighty and ever lasting God, give unto us the increase of faith, hope and charity, and that we may obtain that which thou dost promise, make us to love that which thou dost command, through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen." "He will give His Angels charge over thee to keep thee in all His ways." "Gracious is the Lord and righteous, yea, our God is merciful. I was in misery, and He helped me." "Let us be content, we do not know what is good for us, and God does." God bless you, Nicky dear.

Goodmorning my own sweet one. I hope you slept well and had no fight with hats. Thora, Sandra, Gretchen and I went to a picture gallery, but I was greatly disappointed. There was nothing of interest to be seen, then we drove through the Park. There is an exhibition of English silks going on here, and Grdmama allowed me to choose two pieces for dresses she will give me for my wedding. One is white with little coloured flowers and silver line twisted in and out, and the other a greyish white with pinkish red japonica. I took it immediately, as it reminded me the most of our flower, only that is a prunus something.

It is finer to-day, and this morning the sun shone. Aunt B is remaining here for the Theatre, so Granny and I will return all alone to Windsor. I can well imagine that her letter was a difficulty to decypher.

But I must be off.

Ever, beloved Nicky mine, yr own true little Bride

Alix

Above: Nicholas and Alix. Photo courtesy of TatianaZ on Flickr.

Notes: ramolie = exhausted.

"Freundschaft macht die Menschen Gottes Engeln gleich etc." = "Friendship makes men like God's angels etc."

Alix's letter to Nicholas, dated May 6 (New Style), 1894

Source:

Alexandra Feodorovna: Diaries and Correspondence, volume 2: Engagement and Marriage, 1894, pages 21 to 23, by George Hawkins, 2023

The letter:

No. 5
Windsor Castle, May 6th 1894
Дорогой, милый Ники,
Здравствуйте! I have just come back from service, we had lovely singing and a fine sermon. I prayed most earnestly for my darling. I wish you had been there, I think you would like the English service, the prayers are to beautiful and elevating.

This moment a letter has come from Aunt Alix, full of yr praise and so kind. She wants me to go with them to Sandringham from Saturday to Monday — whether Granny can spare me I don't know as she does not care for our going on visits whilst one is living with her. I shall ask her afterwards. I would much rather have waited and gone with you, it wld have been less shy work as they have always a large party, into wh I so little belong. I forgot to say yesterday that foolish Georgie says I am to insist upon yr wearing high heals and that I am to have quite low ones. May, he says won't change hers, but he wears much higher ones — at first they had been uncomfortable but now he did not mind it any more. I can see yr face when you read this — really so mad! As if the highth made any difference, and a gentleman with high heals looks too absurd and I am sure you would never do it.

Granny is alas very lame to-day, wh depresses her, poor dear. Darling you will be able to get leave sometimes, so as that we can come and see her, as who knows how long we may still have her in our midst and it makes her so unhappy thinking me so far away, as we all have been so constantly here, and she has always been a second mother to us, and treated us more as her own children, not like Grandchildren. It is too awful when I think anything may happen to her — then the whole family wld more or less separate and it wld never be the same again — the head wld be missing, round whom all used to collect. God grant that she may be spared to us still many years.

I must dress now as I am to go out with her and Aunt. I shall probably only follow the carriage a bit as it goes to fast for me now with my rotten old legs.

Me come back again. Granny won't spare me, I am not to go, she has the first right to me and it is the last time and she does not think it good I should go if they have a large party and without you. She seems not to wish me to go there, even not whilst she is at Balmoral. I am to see her in London she says. I am also not to go to Ascot races without you, it wld not be proper, well, honestly, I much prefer not going to the latter.

Last night Aunt B and I played to Granny some things of Grieg wh she liked. Thora, the snipe, is coming this afternoon and I want her to go to Church with me.

I have had such idiotical dreams, I who usually never dream, that it was a mistake, that I was not engaged to you, tho' I loved you awfully, but to your Uncle Alexei, you and I were always to-gether, skating, and I was in despair as I only cared for you and I did not know how to get out of it — too absurd. I was completely confused when I woke up in the morning. It is warm and windy. I hope the post will bring me a letter to-morrow as they take to long coming from Russia and I am longing for news.

Many tender kisses, sweetest One, and bless you. I am yearning for you. The bells chime so beautifully here, I wish they could ring over to you.

I have just seen Dr. Reid and he is going to give me a nerve tonic and I am to take what my Dr told me too. My pulse ought to be stronger. I shall be good and do all I am told as I must get my legs in order, for all the standing. I do wonder when I shall get your first letter from home.

"La vie est un sommeil, l'amoue en est le rêve, et vous avez vécu, si vous avez aimé."

Now my own precious One, I must say Goodbye. Many a tender kiss do I press here for my Pet. God bless and protect you my Own beloved One, my Nicky sweet.
Ever yr deeply loving and devoted little Girl
Alix

Above: Nicholas and Alix.

Above: Queen Victoria.

Notes: "Дорогой, милый Ники, здравствуйте!" = "Dear, darling Nicky, hello!".

Thora = Princess Helena Victoria of Schleswig-Holstein (1870-1948), daughter of Princess Helena and Prince Christian. Cousin of Alix.

"La vie est un sommeil, l'amoue en est le rêve, et vous avez vécu, si vous avez aimé." = "Life is a sleep, love is its dream, and you have lived, if you have loved."

Alix's letter to Nicholas, dated May 5 (New Style), 1894

Source:

Alexandra Feodorovna: Diaries and Correspondence, volume 2: Engagement and Marriage, 1894, pages 17 to 19, by George Hawkins, 2023

The letter:

No. 4 Windsor Castle

May 5th 1894

My own sweet Nicky dear,

Thanks for your dear message in Granny's telegram, we were breakfasting to-gether when it came. Then Gretchen and I went down to Frogmore, picked primroses and sat baking in the sun. She has to climb to get at them now, as my Boysy is alas not here. I had to think so much of the Rosenau and how I made poor you pick the whole time. I fear you must sometime have wished me to Jericho. Then Granny came and we went to the Mausoleum and placed wreathes there. It is so pretty and lies so lovely, you will, I am sure, there are lots of charming pattes and benches. Really it is too bad, the whole day people have been fidgeting, so that I could not finish this letter, and then I had to try on stupid, uninteresting clothes, 2 new blouses I have bought and 2 hats. "Schlumpers" are coming still.

Well, Georgie and May have been here and he sends you his very best love — you are his oldest and best friend. They were very nice, but I wanted you and your big eyes. I have just got a grand telegram: "Les Cosaque d'Orenburg réunis à l'occasion de leur fête patronale de St George's présent votre Altesse de vouloir bien agréer leurs vœux et hommages les plus respectueux inspirés par le dévouement sans bornes qu'ils portent à votre august fiancé les prières de tous sont unanimes pour le bonheur de vo Altesse Impériale. Ataman der Cosaques d'Orenburg General Major Ersehoss." I shall ask someone to help answering it properly as you know alas how weak my French is.

I drove with Granny and A. Beatrice in the Park and had tea in a cottage manor hill. The woods are too lovely and the roads and grass so inviting for a canter. We must ride when you come. My legs have been so bad all day that I have sent for Dr Reid — it will never do for you to have a lame wife. Wife — how funny that sounds! I cannot yet realize that the old owl is to be yours. If only she were worthy enough for you and could be a real help and comfort. But she will do all in her power for her own sweet Pelly whom she adores more than words can express. I hear an old barrelorgan down in the town, it makes me think of my childhood — how long ago that seems now, so much has happened, such never to be forgotten sorrows, and now this joy! Oh sweet one, thanks for your love which I value, oh, so highly. I have to think of days ago — do you remember our evening — I see you still in your white uniform waiting to go to Church, and then I was alone, but my prayers and thoughts followed you. To-morrow in Church our thoughts will meet and our prayers join. I must also go to evening service — it is so beautiful and does one such good — the lovely singing, fine Chapel, oh, could you but be at my side. And Ernie, how he loved it and he has a wife and is at home and happy — I am in a horrid mood to-night, I feel low and depressed and scarcely know how to keep back my tears — it is that dreadful barrelorgan I believe and the solitary lamp wh make me so foolish, but it will never do, my letter will be too idiotic otherwise. Ach, and I want to write to the Weeping Willow for his Birthday and then I must dress for dinner.

Of course, Georgie said I must not keep you all the time, but must let you come to London as he saw so little of you at his wedding wh I understand. I understand anyone wanting you.

Well, what have you been able to arrange for Xenia and Sandro? Give them my best love and say how much I am thinking of them. I forget, did I write out these lines for you already or not?

"Pray for all those who love thee,

All who are loved by thee,

Pray for those who hate thee,

If any such there be.

Then for thyself a blessing

In meekness humbly claim

And link with each petition

Thy great Redeemer's name."

"Love is the one thing on earth we never lose. It is like a cool river growing broader and deeper as it flows towards the sea, which makes all fields greener where it passes, the sweet flowers bloom. It flowed through Paradise long ago and they called it the River of Life." Yes, truly, love is the greatest blessing on earth and he to be pitied who knows it not. But I must rush, Victoria and Ludwig are arriving. Farewell beloved Boy, my own, own true Darling, the sweetest Boy that ever was.

God bless you now and evermore. Many tender kisses from yr ever deeply loving old Spitzbub owl and frog.

Аликсъ

Above: Nicholas and Alix.

Alexandra's letter to Nicholas, dated September 14, 1915, and Nicholas's letter and telegram, dated September 14, 1915

Sources:

Letters of the Tsaritsa to the Tsar, 1914-1916, published by Duckworth & Co., 1923

https://babel.hathitrust.org/cgi/pt?id=inu.30000011396573&view=1up&seq=215&skin=2021

https://www.alexanderpalace.org/letters/september15.html

The letter:

No. 122.
Tsarskoje Selo, Sept. 14-th 1915
My own beloved Darling,
I found your dear telegram this morning upon getting up, I was so grateful as had been anxious getting no news all day. Being very tired I went to bed at 11.20 yr. wire left the Headquarters at 10,31 and reached here 12.10. Thank God the news is better. But what will you do for the army, so as not to have Alexeiev the only responsible one? Do you get Ivanov to come here and Stcherbatov to replace him out there? You will be calmer and Alexeiev wont have to carry the responsibility all alone. — So after all you have to move to Kaluga — what a nuisance, tho' from here I should say the distance is less than now, only you are so far from the troops. But if Ivanov helps Alexeiev then you could go straight from here to see some troops at least. —

What has been going on at sea, I know nothing and read this morning of the losses of the Captain of the 1-st rank, S. S. Viazemsky (heroic death in battle) and the officers and men of the ship announce it, and his body is being brought from the Baltik Station. Then Capt. of the 2-nd rank, Vl. Al. Svinin also fell as a hero. What does this mean? Peter Vasilievitch told the Children some days ago that the Novik had been in battle, but as one keeps the naval news out of the papers, one feels anxious to know what it means. When you are not here of course I only get the news in the morning out of the "Novoye Vremya". If there should be anything good, do wire it, as one hears often false news wh. of course I tell all not to believe.

How is Voyeikov, I cannot forget his madness here and horrid behaviour to Ania. Do take care that he does not take things too much in hand there and does not meddle, as poor old Fred. is old and, alas, becoming rather foolish, the other with his dominating spirit and being most ambitious and sure of himself, and try to fulfil functions wh. don't concern him. Don't you need somebody else still because of the foreigners, or deputations, or orders to be given over, wh. you have not the time to do yourself — a General aide de camp or something like that? — Have you got rid of useless people there? I am glad Boris has gone back again. — I hope he can get the lists of the losses as the wives are in all states. —

One says Leichtenberg is wounded, I forget what regiment he commands but its the Preobr. ladies especially who are nervous. — I wonder what troops you saw the other day. — Now the old Man is with you. Its stupid one prints when he comes to me, thats fr. town, my people don't know it even, as people get angry I mix in — but its my duty to help you. Even in that I am found fault with, sweet Ministers and society, who criticise all, and themselves are occupied with things not concerning them at all. Such is the unedifying world. — Still I am sure you hear far less gossip at the Headquarters and I thank God for it. — Church began at 6-8 yesterday, Baby and I came at 7¼.

Slept badly, am tired and my head rather aches, so keep in bed till luncheon. Paul's asked to come for tea.

Oh my sweet One, thanks and thanks ever so tenderly for yr. sweet letter of the 11-th, I received it with intensest gratitude and joy. It has been kissed over and over again and reread any amount of times. Yes indeed, when will that happy moment arrive, when we shall be cosily seated together in my mauve room! We continue drinking tea in the big room, tho' by the time Paul left at 6¼, it was already quite dark. —

Yes, the changes of ministers. In the train Kussov went with Stcherbatov and he called the old man "crazy old man" thats going far; some in the Duma want Stcherbatov in Goremykin's place, and I understand them because they could do whatsoever they like with him. —

Paul was disgusted with the goings on at Moscou and the deputation that wished to present themselves to you! —

For the old woman's letter, warmest thanks — it pleased me very much and I read it aloud to Ania — Paul does not care for Mrazovsky, said he is such a cad, he remembers him fr. his service — I remember he screamed at the Guard's Convoys once, because a man cld. not say the words of the anthem by heart; the poor Grenadier divisions were so very little famous at the war now. Is it true Kuropatkin, got it, or are those gossips? Wonder how he will show himself this time — God grant alright — being in a lawer position it may go better. Paul asked why Nikolasha is still in the Country, and whether it was true you wrote he was to rest in the Caucasus, at Borjom — I said yes, and that you had allowed him 10 days at Pershino. Lovy, order him south quicker, all sorts of bad elements are collecting round him and want to use him as their flag (God wont permit it) but safer he should be quicker in the Caucasus, and you said 10 days and to-morrow its 3 weeks he left the Headquarters. — Be firm in that too, please. I am so glad, that Paul has realised the game Nikolasha was to play — he rages about the way Nikolasha's a. d. c. speak. — I am glad you made Voyeikov understand things — he is so obstinate and selfsure and a friend of Stcherbatov's. — How happy I am you saw some artillery — what a recompense to them. — Keep Misha with you still, do. — Paul again repeated, that he hopes very earnestly that you will send D. to his regiment, he finds the life he now leads his ruin, as he has absolutely nothing to do and wastes his time, wh. is perfectly true. —

If ever you get any news of the hussars, do let me know, as Paul is anxious, his boy being now in the regiment. Paul is now well, but very weak, pale and thin. — Old Aunt Sasha I. has come to town and will take tea with us on Wednesday, Xenia and Sandro lunch that day with us too. —

The news to-day about our allies is splendid, if true — thank goodness if they are beginning to walk now, it was hard time. And to have taken 24 artillery and made thousands of prisoners, but thats quite beautiful! — I do find it so wrong, that the Ministers do not keep to themselves all the discussions, wh. go on in the Council of Ministers. Once questions are decided, its early enough to know about them. But our uneducated, tho' they imagine themselves intellectual public, read up everything, only grasp a quarter and then set to discussing all, and the papers find fault with everything — hang them!

Miechen wrote to ask again about Plotho, whether anything can be done. — I do thoroughly bore you. — In sweet Petrograd one said you were here some days — now — that Gregory is at the Headquarters, — they are really becoming always more cretinised, and I pitty you when you return. But we shall be wild with joy to have you back again, if ever so short — just to hear your precious voice, see yr. sweet face and hold you long, long in my yearning arms. — My head and eyes ache, so I cant write any more now. Goodbye, Sweetheart, Nicky love. God bless and protect you and keep you fr. all harm. I cover you with kisses.
Ever yr. own old wify
Alix.

I feel quite sad without our hospital, where I have not been since Thursday. —

Ania has gone over to the big palace. — Lovy, are you sending people of your suite to the fabrics? Please don't forget it. —

My "Alexandrovtsi" are near Dvinsk and have rather heavy losses amongst the men. —

The Children all kiss you, Marie is overjoyed with your letter. —

Yuzik never went to the Headquarters, the children imagined it. —

I like the story about the hunt for the germans near Orsha; our Cosacks would have found them fast enough. Are they aiming at Riga again? Lovy sweet, me wants you, oh so, so much, precious Darling. Your letters and telegrams ary my life now. — Kiss dear Misha, Dmitri.

My love to the old Man and N. P.

Think over about Ivanov sweet one — I think you would feel calm — or if he were with Alexeiev at the Headquarters and then you would be free to move about — and when you remain longer at the Headquarters he could go round inspecting all and give you news how things are going and have an eye on all, and his presence would be good everywhere. —

Sleep well, I bless and kiss you!

Nicholas's letter:

Mogilev. 14 September, 1915
MY OWN BELOVED, DARLING SUNNY,
My heartfelt thanks for your dear letters, which are always a source of joy and consolation to me. The old man (Gor.) has just arrived, and I shall receive him at 6 o'clock. I am very sorry for you, that you had to tire yourself so much during these busy days...

So far it is difficult for me to settle the day of my coming home, because it depends on the Stavka being moved to Kalouga; that will take five or six days — so that, God willing, we shall spend about a week together! What happiness!

The story of the German patrols has ended as I thought it would — in a comic fashion. It was our own patrol of 7 Cossacks, which, having gone astray, broke off from one of the cavalry, and got to the south as far as Mogilev. How silly it was to invent such a story!

The weather continues to be lovely. I go out every day in a car with Misha, and we spend a great part of my leisure together, as in former years. He is so calm and charming — he sends you his very heartiest greetings.

On the whole, things at the front are not bad. The Germans are still pressing at the top [probably, "at the extreme end of the line" or "at the extreme north"] at Dvinsk, and from the direction of Vilna, to the east, as well as from Baranovitchi. Serious fighting is going on in these places all the time. Well, my dear, I must finish. God bless you and the dear children! Next time I shall write to Anastasia. I kiss you all tenderly.
Always your
NICKY.

Nicholas's telegram:

Telegram. Stavka. 14 September 1915.
Hearty thanks for telegram. I have just seen the old man. I have decided to call all the Ministers here. He asked for it to be done. I have written. The weather is warm. I am sorry for old Arseniev's death. Please give Shcheglov orders to take back into the library all the letters and papers which I allowed him to use. I kiss you fondly.
NICKY.

Above: Nicholas and Alexandra. Photo courtesy of Ilya Grigoryev at lastromanovs on VK.

Alexandra's letter to Nicholas, dated September 12, 1915, and Nicholas's letter and telegram, dated September 12, 1915

Sources:

Letters of the Tsaritsa to the Tsar, 1914-1916, published by Duckworth & Co., 1923

https://babel.hathitrust.org/cgi/pt?id=inu.30000011396573&view=1up&seq=210&skin=2021

https://www.alexanderpalace.org/letters/september15.html

The letter:

No. 120.
Tsarskoje Selo, Sept. 12-th 1915
My own beloved One,
It is pouring and dreary. Slept very badly, head aches rather, am still tired from Peterhof & feel my heart, am awaiting Becker. — How I wish the time would come for me to write only simple, nice letters, instead of bothersome ones. But things dont at all go as they should, & the old Man who came to me yesterday evening, was very sad. He longs for you to come quickly, if only for three days, to see all & to make the changes, as he finds it more than difficult working with ministers who make opposition. Things must be put clearly — either he leaves, or he remains & the ministers are changed, wh. of course would be best. He is going to send you a report about the press — they go after orders Nikolasha gave in July, that one may write whatsoever one likes about the government, only not touch you. When Goremykin complains to Stcherbatov he throws the fault upon Polivanov & vice versa. Stcherbatov lied to you when he said one would not print what is said at Moscou. — They go on writing everything. Am so glad you declined seeing those creatures. They don't dare use the word constitution, but they go sneeking round it — verily it would be the ruin of Russia & against your coronation oath it seems to me, as you are a autocrat, thank God. — The changes must be made, cant think why the old Man is against Khvostov — his Uncle does not much care for him & they say he is a man who thinks he knows everything. But I explained to the old Man that we need a decided caracter, one who is not afraid, he is in the Duma, so has the advantage of knowing everybody & will understand how to speak to them & how to protect & defend your government. He proposes nobody, au fond, & we need a "man". — He begged me to let Varnava know that he must not appear at the Synod but say he is ill — wh. is the best thing, tho' the papers are furious that he wont appear. But he has told them all & answered everything — great brutes, I cannot call them otherwise. If you could only come, then at once see the Metropolitan & tell him you forbid that subject to be touched & that you insist upon your instructions being fulfilled. He cried of despair when Samarin was appointed & now he is completely in his hands — but he must have a strong word from you. Yr. arrival here will be a punitive expedition & no rest, poor Sweetheart, but its necessary without delay, they go on writing without ceasing. But they cant propose anybody — Makarov — no good — Arseniev fr. M. screams against our Fr. — Rogozin — hates our friend. — Prince Urussov (don't know him) — knows our friend, one says much good of him. My head aches from hunting for men, but anybody rather than Samarin, who openly goes against you by his behaviour in the Synod.
Can you really not return soon, Lovy, things seem taking a better turn, thank God & will still. Wonder what troops you saw pass. Old man has a sitting of Ministers on Sunday, thats why he cant leave to-day. If you come Thursday, he says he need not go there before, but I find you can see him quieter now & speak over & prepare all for yr. return.

He says Sazonov is pitiful to behold, like "une poule mouillée" — what has happened to him? He tells Goremykin nothing at all & he must know what is going on. The ministers are rotten & Krivoshein goes on working underhand he says — all so ugly & ungentlemanly; — they need your iron will wh. you will show, won't you. You see the effect of yr. having taken over all, well do the same here, i. e. be decided, repremand them very severely for their behaviour & for not having listened to yr. orders given at that sitting here — I am more than disgusted with those cowards. — Can Alex. spare you 3 days, soon? Do answer this if you can. You cannot imagine how despairing it is not being able to wire all one would & needs to & not to get an answer. You have not time to answer my questions of wh. there are 100, but always the same ones, as they are pressing & my head is weary from thinking & seeing things so badly — & beginning to spread in the country. Those types go talking against the government everywhere, etc. & sow the seed of discontent. Before the Duma meets in a month, a new strong cabinet must be formed & quicker, so as that they have time to work & prepare together beforehand. — He proposed I should see Samarin but what good? The man will never listen to me, & just do the contrary out of opposition & anger — I know him also but too well by his behaviour now, — wh. did not surprise me, as I know he would be thus. — Goremykin wants you to return & do all this, but waste no time. You are calm out there, & that is right, but still Sweetest, remember you are a bit too slow in deciding & dawdling is never a good thing. The big girls have gone to the hospital, the 3 young ones are learning. A. is going to town to Alia & her mother till 3, & I shall lie again till luncheon as heart a little enlarged & feel so tired. — Now Yuzik must be already al the Headquarters. Is it true that we are only 200 Versts from Lemberg again. Are we to hurry on so much & not come round and squash the Germans? What about Bulgaria? To have them in our flank will be more than rotten, but they have surely bought Ferdinand. —

How is Misha's humour? Kiss the dear boy from me. Have no news yet from Olga somehow her visit was sad — we scarcely got a glimpse of her & she left sad & anxious. —

Just received a perfumed letter fr. Olga Palei. Paul is better — she at last had news fr. their boy, it took him a week to get to the transport of his regiment & now he hopes to find the regiment. — I beleive the lancers are not far fr. Baranovitchi; a river one speaks of near there, where was heavy fighting — what fighting everywhere!

Mackensen is not the one we knew. There is a Fürst Bentheim at Irkutsk (a sort of relation of Marie Erbachs). Ernie asks in Max name whether there would be any possibility for him to be exchanged — he seems to be the last of his family — perhaps somebody of ours cld. be returned in exchange. He only asks like that, not knowing whether its possible. I shall let Rostovtzev know the same thing, — I doubt it being possible unless he gives his word of honour not to fight any more against any of the allies — only under that condition, I find, one can change him. I shall write this to Rost. & whom it concerns will know what to do, I have no idea whom one can ask for in return, nor whether its allowed. — About the gasses Ernie is also disgusted, but he says that when he was near Reims beginning of Sept. last year, the English used the gasses there — & German chemical industries being better, they made worse gasses. — Ania was at the Church of "Joy to all grieving" in town & brought this little Image for you. — Fancy our surprise — suddenly Kussov turned up. All his cavalry is being sent down to Dvinsk & during their move he flew off here, arrived in town this morning, probably goes on to-morrow, meets his wife & off to Dvinsk to meet his regiment. He had heavy losses — is in despair with Yuri Trubetskoy who makes fault upon fault & others dare not say anything, because one says you particularly care for him (wh. Kussov doubts). Thanks to him Kussov's men got surrounded, because Yury took the three battalions of infantry away wh. guarded them, for himself — but they got through & only many horses were taken, as it was the place where they were standing together — he told his mind rather clearly to Trubetskoy. He came flying off to know how things were going, as letters never reached him & he wanted to hear all. Is already disgusted with town & furious with the "rotten atmosphere". Was sorry you sent Mikheyev, because he is so very unrepresentive & does not know how to collect all round him & speak & thank in yr. name. — He saw the Kabardintsi passing a little while ago. Asked questions without end & says the "spirit" in the army splendid. It does one good & refreshes one seeing such a man straight from there — one also gets musty fusty here, tho' I fully trust & believe all must go well, if God will give us the necessary wisdom & energy. — Don't you find Baby's writing is getting very nice & tidy? I remained quietly at home to-day, saw Mme Zizi too. — Why is Boris not with his regiment? 3 of our Cav. Divisions got the order to break through the Germans wh. they did & are in their rear now, Tatiana's regiment is there too. —
Blessings & kisses without end & tenderest love, Sweetheart, lovy mine, fr. yr. very own old
Wify.

Nicholas's letter:

Mogilev. 12 September, 1915.
MY PRECIOUS SUNNY,
Bless you for your two sweet letters! I often re-read them, and then it seems to me that you are lying on your sofa and that I am listening to you, sitting in my armchair by the lamp. When will that happy moment come? If God will grant that matters improve at Dvinsk and the position of our troops is consolidated, I might find an opportunity for flying over to Ts. S. But there is so much to do here — these changes of Ministers, and the strengthening of the old man's position! I shall call him out here; there is no time to lose! Old Fred. understands this admirably, and exhorts me to hold on to Gor., which is very nice of him.
I have explained all this to V. also, during our walks. He seems to have understood it properly at last.

This morning V. reported to me the absurd rumours which are being circulated here in the town, that somewhere near Orsha (60 versts from here) a German patrol of cavalry scouts has been seen. Mounted police were at once sent out in all directions — and part of our convoy. Of course, so far they have not discovered so much as a rat. It is all so foolish; I laughed heartily.

After dinner to-day, going out in my car, I stopped to look at a field battery which has come from some distance away to protect this town from aeroplanes. I can understand that! [i. e., that is the right thing!] It was very pleasant to see the officers, men and horses, who have such a splendid healthy appearance — 17 men received decorations. Further on I met a large detachment of soldiers who were marching towards the town. I stopped, got out and let them pass by me. It was the 2nd Battalion of the Vladivostok Garrison Artillery; they have come from Brest Litovsk, exactly a month's march by the main road, and are on their way to the north of Orsha. To all appearances, the men have arrived in very good condition; they have a few sick in their carts, whom they will leave in the hospitals before going from here.

Misha has just arrived. He is sitting in my room, reading the newspaper. He has asked permission to stay a little longer. Yesterday two of his regiments launched a splendid attack and took 23 officers and over 400 prisoners — all Hungarians.

You ask me about the trip to Novgorod — of course, go now without me, as most probably I shall not have time when I return home. There is no thought of my leaving here before the 15th-20th.

Well, my little bird, I must finish. I love you passionately with an everlasting love. A thousand thanks for your sweet No. 350, which I have only just received. God bless you and the children! Tenderly, tenderly I kiss you all. Always, my darling Sunny,
Your old
NICKY.

Nicholas's telegram:

Telegram. Stavka. 12 September, 1915.
My warmest thanks for dear letter. The old man has telegraphed that he is coming on Monday; have written him an encouraging letter. It is out of the question for me to come before a week's time. Lovely, summer-like weather. In thought I am always with you.
NICKY.

Above: Nicholas and Alexandra. Photo courtesy of Ilya Grigoriev at lastromanovs on VK.

Notes: Madame Becker was a euphemism that Alexandra and her daughters used to refer to their menstrual periods.

Alexandra almost always referred to Grigori Rasputin as "our Friend".

une poule mouillée = a wet hen.

Alexei's letter to Alexandra, dated November 27, 1915

Source:

Kler Chernikina at lastromanovs on VK

https://vk.com/lastromanovs?w=wall-56510987_54458

The letter:

Ставка, 27 Ноября 1915 г.

(клевер 4-листник) шчастие

Дорогая моя Мама

Эти дни ты себя плохо чувствовала, я очень жалел Тебя. Сегодня праздник Нижегороцев и (оба) Наврузов и Чавчавазды завтракали снами. Наврузов просил передать Вам что он хочет приехать к Вам и очень кланяется. Утром учился потом завтракал со всеми. Потом отдыхал и гулял в саду. Николай Павлович сегодня уехал и просил вам очень очень кланятся. Очень жалко что вас тут нет.

Папа читает. Только что получил Твое письмо от П. В. П. Поцелуй Джоя. Крепко Вас целую. Да хранит Вас Господь Бог +!

Любящий Вас Алексей

Кланяйся В. Николявичу.

English translation (my own):

Stavka, November 27, 1915

(4-leaf clover) happiness

My dear Mama

These days you felt bad, I felt sorry for You. Today is the holiday of Nizhegorotsev and (both) Navruzov and Chavchavazdy had breakfast with us. Navruzov asked me to tell You that he wants to come to You and bows very much. In the morning I studied and then had breakfast with everyone. Then I rested and walked in the garden. Nikolai Pavlovich left today and asked You to bow very very much. It's a pity You're not here.

Papa is reading. Just received Your letter from P. V. P. Kiss Joy. I kiss You firmly. The Lord God keep You +!

Your loving Alexei

Bow to V. Nikolyavich.

Above: Nicholas and Alexandra with Alexei. Photo courtesy of Ilya Grigoryev at lastromanovs on VK.

Tatiana's letter to Olga Voronova, dated November 3, 1915

Source:

Kler Chernikina at lastromanovs on VK

https://vk.com/lastromanovs?w=wall-56510987_49898

The letter:

Царское Село.

3го Ноября. 1915 г.

Ольга душка,

Спасибо Вам за Ваше письмо. Очень обрадовалась за Вас когда услышала, что Ваш муж назначается сюда. Как хорошо выходит, что Вы так много вместе. Алексей пишет, что он страшно доволен быть опять с Папа, и медалью он ужасно доволен и горд. За Папа мы так рады тоже, что он получил крест. Теперь эти дни я одна работаю в лазарете т. к. Мама опять устала и у нея сердце болит, а Ольга кажется просто переутомилась и ее уложили несколько дней. Но так она ничего, а утомляется стоять и что бы скорее поправилась ее и положили. — Но сейчас у нас не много работы в лазарете, т. к. мало офицеров и не у всех перевязки. Ну а после перевязок если есть время до часу, я с ними играю в какие нибудь игры. Нам пристроили гостиную т. к. раньше всем приходилось сидеть в коридоре и не было так уютно и обедают тоже все там т. к. этот дом был построен для заразных больных и он был готов как раз к началу войны и т. к. он был новый и чистый его Мама и выбрала для раненых.

А что Вы поделываете? Много-ли бываете с Эллой и как она бедняжка? Здоровы ли Ваш брат и beau-frère? Наверно Вы очень рады попасть опять на Вашу старую квартиру?

Так грустно здесь без Папа и Алексея. Но я рада что они вместе, по крайней мере Папа не так скучно. Они живут вместе в одной комнате. Общая спальня и кабинет. У Папа большой письменный стол, а у Алексея маленький, на котором он занимается с своим французским гувернером Mr. Gilliard. Вы его кажется видели в Ливадии? Алексей его очень любит. Днем Алексей ездит с Папа и остальными на прогулку за город или через Днепр. Гуляют костры устраивают. Он там таким самостоятельным завтракает со всеми масса народу и иностранцы. Он их нисколько не конфузится и разговаривает с ними по французски. По английски у него меньше выходит, но всё же ничего. —

Ну, досвиданья Ольга душка. Сердечный привет Вашему мужу. Вас крепко целую как люблю.

Ваша

Татьяна.

English translation (my own):

Tsarskoe Selo.

November 3rd. 1915.

Olga darling,

Thank you for your letter. I was very happy for you when I heard that your husband was appointed here. How good it is that you are together so much. Alexei writes that he is terribly pleased to be with Papa again, and he is terribly pleased and proud of the medal. We are so happy for Papa too that he received the cross. Now these days I work alone in the infirmary because Mama is tired again and her heart hurts, but Olga seems to be just overtired and she was laid down for several days. So she's okay, but she gets tired of standing and that she would soon recover and be laid down. But now we don't have a lot of work in the infirmary because there are few officers and not everyone has dressings. Well, after dressings, if there is time before one, I play some games with them. They added a living room for us because before everyone had to sit in the corridor and it wasn't so comfortable and everyone dined there too because this house was built for contagious patients and it was ready just in time for the start of the war, and because it was new and clean, Mama chose it for the wounded.

What are you doing? Do you spend a lot of time with Ella and how is she poor thing? Are your brother and beau-frère healthy? You must be very happy to get back to your old apartment?

So sad here without Papa and Alexei. But I'm glad that they are together, at least Papa is not so bored. They live together in the same room. Shared bedroom and office. Papa has a large desk, and Alexei has a little one, where he studies with his French tutor Mr. Gilliard. You seem to have seen him in Livadia? Alexei loves him very much. During the day Alexei goes with Papa and the others for a walk outside the city or across the Dnieper. They make bonfires. He has such an independent breakfast there with all the masses of people and foreigners. He does not embarrass them at all and speaks French with them. In English, he has less output, but still nothing. —

Well goodbye Olga darling. Hearty greetings to your husband. I kiss you firmly as I love you.

Your

Tatiana.

Above: Nicholas and Alexandra with Alexei. Photo courtesy of Ilya Grigoryev at lastromanovs on VK.

Above: Alexei with Pierre Gilliard. Photo courtesy of Ilya Grigoryev at lastromanovs on VK.

Above: Tatiana with Alexei.

Note: beau-frère = brother-in-law.

Alexandra's letter to Nicholas, dated August 23, 1915, and Nicholas's telegrams, dated August 23, 1915

Sources:

Letters of the Tsaritsa to the Tsar, 1914-1916, published by Duckworth & Co., 1923

https://babel.hathitrust.org/cgi/pt?id=inu.30000011396573&view=1up&seq=168&skin=2021

https://www.alexanderpalace.org/letters/august15.html

The letter:

No. 99.

Tsarskoje Selo, Aug. 23-rd 1915

All my thoughts & prayers surround you in tenderest love. Such calm filled my soul (tho' terribly sad) when I saw you leave in peace and serene. Your face had such a lovely expression, like when our Friend left. God verily will bless you and your undertakings after this moral victory. Wonder how you slept — I went straight to bed, deadbeat & very lonely.

Dear Girlies proposed to sleep by turn in the room next door, as I am all alone on this floor — but I begged them not to, am quite accustomed to it & don't mind. I feel you near me, bless & kiss your cushion. Slept midling. Such a sunny morning — the three girls went at 9 to Church, as Olga & Tatiana wish to work in the hospital till 12½. — Wonder how the spirits around you are — your peace must spread itself upon them. I had a talk with N. P. & begged him not to heed to Voyeikov's varying moods. — The whole time those odious trains make a noise to-day, the wind comes from that side, but to me it seems that big new chimney (where the electric mashenes are) makes the same noise, as it continues since a long time with intervals. — The Churchbells are ringing, I love the sound, with the windows open; I shall go at 11, as till now, tho' the heart & chest ache, it is not enlarged & I take many drops. The body feels very beaten & achy. Have got Botkin to allow Anastasia to sit in the sun on the balkony, where there are 20 degrees, it can only do the child good. It is 10 & Baby has not yet turned up, took a good sleep no doubt.

Such peace in the soul after these anxious days — & may you continue feeling the same. — If you have the occasion, give N. P. our love & give him news as I don't let A. wire now for a time, after one was so nasty & she gave him news of my health always. — I hope old Fred. is not too gaga & wont beg for fieldmarshal etc., wh. can only be given after the war, if at all. — Remember to comb your hair before all difficult talks & decisions, the little comb will bring its help. Dont you feel calm now that you have become "sure of yourself" — its not pride or conceit — but sent by God & it will help you in the future & give strength to the others to fulfil your orders. Have let the old man know, that I want to see him today, & he is to choose the hours. —

Well, Deary, I just had the old man for half an hour. He was so glad to get your message, that you left quiet & calmly & Frederick's letter (I did not know he had written). But shocked & horrified with the ministers' letter, written by Samarin he says. Finds no words for their behaviour & says how awfully difficult it is for him to preside, knowing they all go against him & his ideas, but he wld. never think of asking to leave, as he knows you would tell him if it were yr. wish. He has to see them to-morrow & will mention what he thinks about this letter, wh. is so false & untrue in saying "all Russia" & so forth — I begged him to be as energetic as possible. He will also talk before with the minister of war, to know what you told him. About Khvostov he says better not, it is he who spoke in the Duma against the government & Germans (is a nephew of the minister of justice), finds him trop léger, probably not quite sure person in some respects. He will think over names and send or bring me a list for you of people he thinks might do. — Finds certainly Stcherbatov cannot remain, already that he took no hold on the press is a sign what an incapable person he is for that place. — He says, he would not be astonished, if Stcherbatov & Sazonov asked to be released from their places, wh. they have no right to — Sazonov goes about crying (the fool) & I said I was convinced, that our allies will immensely appreciate yr. action, with wh. he agreed too. —

I told him to look at all as a miasm of St. Petersburg & Moscou & that all need a good airing to see all with fresh eyes & hear no gossip fr. morn to night. — He says, the Duma cannot be dispersed before the end of the week as they have not finished their work — he & others especially fear the left may outpass the Duma — I begged him not to worry about it, that I am convinced its not so serious & more talking than anything else & that they wanted to frighten you & now that you have shown a strong will of your own, they will shut up. It seems Sazonov called them all together yesterday — fools. I told him that the ministers were all des poltrons & he agreed — thinks Polivanov will work well. Poor man, it hurt him reading all the heresies of those, who signed against him & I was so pained for him. He so rightly says, each must honestly tell you his opinion, but when you have said yr. wish, all must fulfill it & forget their own desires, they don't agree, neither did poor Serge! —

I tried to cheer him up, & a wee bit I think I did, as I showed him how little serious, au fond, all this empty noise is. Now the Germans & Austrians have to occupy minds & all & nothing else — & a good minister of the interior will keep order. — He says, in town good mood & quiet after yr. speech & reception — & so it will be, I told him what our Friend said. — He begged me to see Krupensky to hear, what he has to say about the Duma, as he knows everybody — do you agree, then I certainly will, & without any noise. Only wire "agree". — I told him Ivanov also begged you to come, through me. —

Finds the more you show yr. energy, the better, to wh. I agreed, & he also found the idea good, that you should send your eyes to the fabrics, even if the suite don't understand much, but to show they come from you is good — not only the Duma who looks after all. — I went with Baby to Church & prayed so fervently for you. The Priest spoke beautifully & I only regretted the ministers were not there to hear it & the men listened with deepest interest. What this 3 days lent means — & how all must cling & work together around you & so on, beautiful & so true & all ought to have heard it. — Anastasia remained out till 4 — & I writing on the balkony. Baby returned fr. Peterhof & has gone to Ania, where Olga, Tatiana & Maria are. — Here is a letter from old Damansky, he left it at Ania's when she was out — he came with his old sister half paralised & scarcely able to speak — am so pleased you gave that honest man this happiness, it will console him in his sorrow. —

I copy out 2 telegrams from our Friend. If you have an occasion, show them to N. P. — one must keep him up more about our Friend, as in town he hears too much against him, & begins to heed less to His telegrams. Goremykin asked whether you would be back this week (to disperse the Duma then) then I said you could not possibly yet tell. —

The Children & I went to Znamenje at 3¼ & I placed a very big candle, wh. will burn very long & carry my prayers to God's throne for you & before the Virgin & St. Nicolas. — Now, my love, I must end. — God bless & protect you & help you & all you undertake. Kisses without end on all dear places, for ever yr. very own trusting proud

Wify.

Only a word en passant, Alia's husband returned & each time speaks against Brussilov as does also Keller — you enquire other opinions about him still. — The Headquarters has given the order, that all officers with German names serving in the staffs are to be sent out to the army, so Alia's husband too, tho' Pistolkors is a Swedish name & more devoted servant you scarcely have. According to me, it is again wrongly done — gently each general ought to have been told to hint to those to go back to their regiments, that they want others & these are to have their turn to fight. All is done so clumsily. I shall write to you always all I hear, (if think right) as may be of use to you to know now & to prevent injustices — can imagine what Kussov will write, so as to help the good cause.

Now I must lie down, as very tired — am feeling better & spirits up & full of trust, courage & hope — & pride in my Sweetheart. Good bless, guard & guide you. —

Hope Voyeikov did not tell you the rot he told A. he wld. beg you to make Nikolasha give his word of honour not to stop at Moscou — coward Voyeikov, & fool, as tho' you were jealous or frightened — I assure you I long to show my immortal trousers to those poltrons.

If Paul should ask to see me, can I tell him that you wish to take him next time. It will touch him & change his thoughts into the right current; he is sure to come — wire about Krupensky agree or don't agree I shall understand — tell Paul, or don't tell Paul. —

Smell the letter.

Nicholas's telegrams:

Telegram. Vitebsk. 23 August, 1915.

Thank you heartily for your dear letter, the children too. I slept well; am feeling strong and resolute. I hope that you are calm, and not very tired. I shall telegraph to-night, when all is over. I bless you and love you infinitely.

Nicky.

...

Telegram. Stavka. 23 August, 1915.

Thanks for news. The meeting has passed off wonderfully well and simply. He is leaving the day after to-morrow, but the change over has taken place to-day already. Now all is done. I kiss you and the children tenderly.

Nicky.

Above: Nicholas and Alexandra. Photo courtesy of Ilya Grigoryev at lastromanovs on VK.

Above: Olga, Tatiana, Maria, Anastasia and Alexei. Photo courtesy of Ilya Grigoryev at lastromanovs on VK.

Notes: Alexandra almost always referred to Grigori Rasputin as "our Friend".

trop légere = too light.

poltrons = cowards.

au fond = in the end.

en passant = in passing.

Valentina Chebotareva's diary entry, dated October 24, 1915

Source:

http://kfinkelshteyn.narod.ru/Tzarskoye_Selo/Vosp_Chebotarevoy1.htm

The diary entry (with some of Alexandra's words translated into Russian from French):

24-го октября [1915].
Все эти дни государыня приезжает, мила, ласкова и трогательна, говорила и со мной ласково и приветливо. Оказывается, мяса и рыбы не ест по убеждению: "Лет десять-одиннадцать тому назад была в Сарове и решила не есть больше ничего животного, а потом и доктора нашли, что это необходимо по состоянию моего здоровья". Сидела долго с работой в столовой. Одна из княжон играла в пинг-понг, другая в шашки, кто читал, кто болтал, все просто и уютно. Государыня сказала Варваре Афанасьевне:

"Посмотрите, как малышки забавляются, как эта простая жизнь позволяет отдохнуть... большие сборища, высшее общество — брр! Я возвращаюсь к себе совершенно разбитой. Я должна себе заставлять говорить, видеться с людьми, которые, я отлично знаю, против меня, работают против меня... Двор, эти интриги, эта злоба, как это мучительно и утомительно. Недавно я, наконец, была избавлена кое от кого, и то лишь когда появились доказательства. Когда я удаляюсь из этого общества, я устраиваю свою жизнь как мне нравится; тогда-говорят: 'она — экзальтированная особа'; осуждают тех, кого я люблю, а ведь для того, чтобы судить, надо все знать до деталей. Часто я знаю, что за человек, передо мной; достаточно на него раз взглянуть, чтобы понять: можно ему доверять или нет".

Бедная, несчастная... Такой она мне и рисовалась всегда — сама чистая и хорошая, цельная и простая, она томится условностью и мишурой большого света, а в грязь Григория она не может поверить. В результате — враги в верхних слоях и недоверие нижних.

... Сегодня Татьяна Николаевна сначала приехала одна: "Ведь я еду сюда, как в свой второй дом", и, действительно, такая милая и уютная была. Побежала со мной в кухню, где мы готовили бинты. Государыня посмеялась и сказала, что Татьяна, как хорошая домашняя собачка, привыкла. ...

My reconstruction of Alexandra's words in French (my translation; I cannot find the original):

Regardez comment les petites s'amusent, comment cette vie simple permet de se reposer... de grands rassemblements, de la haute société — brr! Je reviens à moi-même complètement brisée. Je dois me forcer à parler, à voir des gens qui, je sais très bien, sont contre moi, travaillent contre moi... La cour, ces intrigues, cette colère, combien c'est douloureux et épuisant. Récemment, j'ai finalement été délivrée de quelqu'un, et alors seulement quand les preuves sont apparues. Quand je me suis retirée de cette société, j'arrange ma vie comme je l'aime; puis ils disent: «c'est une personne exaltée»; ils condamnent ceux que j'aime, mais pour juger, il faut tout savoir en détail. Souvent je sais de quel genre de la personne est en face de moi; assez de temps pour lui jeter un oeil pour comprendre si l'on peut lui faire confiance ou non.

English translation (my own):

October 24, [1915].
All these days the Empress has been arriving, sweet, affectionate and touching, and spoke to me kindly and affably. It turns out that she does not eat meat and fish because of her conviction: "Ten or eleven years ago I was in Sarov and decided not to eat any more animal products, and then the doctors found that it was necessary for my health." I sat for a long time with work in the dining room. One of the Grand Duchesses played ping-pong, the other played checkers, read, chatted, everything was simple and comfortable. The Empress said to Varvara Afanasievna:

"Look how the little ones amuse themselves, how this simple life allows one to rest... big gatherings, high society — brr! I return to myself completely broken. I have to force myself to talk, to see people who I know very well are against me, they work against me... The court, these intrigues, this anger, how painful and exhausting it is. Recently, I was finally delivered from someone, and then only when the evidence appeared. When I retire from this society, I arrange my life as I like it; then they say: 'she is an exalted person'; they condemn those whom I love, but in order to judge, one must know everything in detail. Often I know what kind of person is in front of me; enough time for him take a look to understand whether one can trust him or not."

Poor, unhappy woman... I always pictured her like that — she was pure and good, whole and simple, she languishes with the convention and tinsel of the great world, and she cannot believe in the filth of Grigori. As a result, there are enemies in the upper layers and distrust of the lower ones.

... Today Tatiana Nikolaevna first came alone: ​​"After all, I come here like it's my second home", and, indeed, she was so sweet and nice. She ran with me to the kitchen, where we were preparing bandages. The Empress laughed and said that Tatiana, like a good pet dog, was used to it. ...

Above: Alexandra with Olga and Tatiana. Photo courtesy of Ilya Grigoryev at lastromanovs on VK.