Showing posts with label Sophie Buxhoeveden. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Sophie Buxhoeveden. Show all posts

Thursday, July 4, 2024

Alexandra's letter to Nicholas, dated October 3, 1915, and Nicholas's telegram, dated October 3, 1915

Sources:

Letters of the Tsaritsa to the Tsar, 1914-1916, published by Duckworth & Co., 1923

The letter:

No. 132.
Tsarskoje Selo, Oct. 3-rd 1915
My own beloved Darling,
A gloriously bright, sunny day — 2 degr. of frost in the night. What a pitty, nothing is written in the papers about your having seen the troops — I hope it will appear to-morrow. It is necessary to print all such things without mentioning of course what troops you saw. — Am eagerly awaiting details how it all was.

So silly, in Moscou they want to give Samarin an address when he returns fr. the country — it seems that horror Vostokov has sent him a telegram in the name of his two "jlocks", Moscou & Kolomna — so the dear little Makari wrote to the Consistory to insist upon a copy of Vostokov's telegram to Samarin & to know what gave him the right to forward such a telegr. — how good, if the little Metropolitan can get rid of Vostokov, its high time, he does endless harm & its he who leads Samarin. Moscou is in a rotten state, but God grant nothing at all will be — but they need feeling yr. displeasure. — Sweetheart, me misses you very, very much, I want your kisses, I want to hear your dear voice & gaze into your eyes. —

Thanks ever so much for yr. telegram — well Baby must have been pleased that he was present at the review. How cosy yr. beds must be in the same room. And a nice drive too. — I always give over by telephone all you write to Vladimir Nikolaievitch.

This morning I went in to the little Boy — he is fast sinking & the quiet end may come this evening. — I spoke with his poor mother & she was so brave & understood all so rightly.

Then we worked in the hospital & Vladimir Nikolaievitch made an injection to the new officer — probably to-morrow will be the operation.

Pss. Gedroitz has 39 & feels so ill — eresypelis in the head one fears, so she begged Derevenko to replace her for serious operations. Nastinka lunched, then I received generals Prince Tumanov, Pavlov, Benkendorf, Isa. The inauguration of the Winter-Palace hospital can only be on the 10-th as the red cross has not brought the beds etc. yet — our part is done — so you see I better keep quiet after that ceremony (& Bekker no doubt) & the 11 & 12 — if so, then I would be at Moghilev 15-th morning at 9 if that suits you? Thats a Thursday, just 2 weeks fr. the day you left. You let me know. That means I am the 13-th at Tver, 14-th other places nearing you. — A lovely bright morn, its 10 minutes past 5 & becoming rather dark, we took tea after a drive to Pavlovsk, so cold — the little ones are trying on & the big ones have gone to clean the instruments in our hospital. At 6½ we go to the evening service in our new little Church. —

In the evening we see our Friend at Ania's to bid goodbye. He begs you very much to send a telegram to the King of Servia, as he is very anxious that Bulgaria will finish them off — so I enclose the paper again for you to use it for yr. telegram — the sense in yr. words & shorter of course reminding them of their Saints & so on. — Make Baby show you Peter Vassilievitch envelope, its sweet. I shall also address my letter separatly to him, he will feel prouder. Derevenko has got our presents for him & can arrange them in the bedroom before your dinner. — Wonder, how you will feast the Convoy.

Now I must end my letter, Sweetheart. God bless & protect you & the holy Virgin guard you from all harm. Every goodwish for our sweet Sunbeam's Namesday.

I kiss you without end & hold you tightly clasped to my old heart wh. yearns for you ever, Nicky sweet, yr. very own wify
Alix.

Nicholas's telegram:

Telegram. Stavka. 3 October, 1915.
Hearty thanks for dear letter sent by courier. Of course the Little One was present at yesterday's magnificent review and was very pleased. We arrived during the night, left the train at 10 in the morning, and have settled down quite cosily. Clear but cold. We went for a walk in the wood. Both embrace you closely.
NICKY.


Above: Nicholas and Alexandra with Alexei.

Notes: Madame Becker was a euphemism that Alexandra and her daughters used to refer to their menstrual periods.

Alexandra almost always referred to Grigori Rasputin as "our Friend".

Servia = the old name for Serbia.

Alexandra's second letter to Nicholas, dated October 1, 1915

Source:

Letters of the Tsaritsa to the Tsar, 1914-1916, published by Duckworth & Co., 1923
The letter:

No. 130.
Tsarskoje Selo, Oct. 1-st 1915
Sweet precious One,
It seems a messenger leaves this evening, so I profit to send you a word. Well there we are again separated — but I hope it will be easier for you whilst Sunbeam is near you — he will bring life into your house & cheer you up. How happy he was to go, with what excitement he has been awaiting this great moment to travel with you alone. I was afraid he might be sad, as when we left for the south to meet you in Dec. he cried at the station, but no, he was happy. Tatiana & I felt very hard to be brave — you dont know what it is to be without you & the wee one. I just looked at my little book & saw with despair that I shall... the 10-th... to travel & inspect hospitals the two first days I really cant, as otherwise shall get again one of my raging headaches — is it not too stupid! —

We drove this afternoon to Pavlovsk — the air was very autumnal — then we went into Znamenia & placed candles & I prayed hard for my darlings. Hereafter Ania read to me. After tea I saw Isa & then I went to the poor boy he has changed, a good deal since yesterday. I stroked his head a while & then he woke up — I said you & Alexei sent messages wh. delighted him & he thanked so much — then went to sleep again — that was the first time he had spoken to-day. My consolation when I feel very down & wretched is to go to the very ill & try & bring them a ray of light & love — so much suffering one has to go through in this year, it wears one out.

So Kira went with you, thats good & just — may he only not be stupid & sleep. Do so hope you can manage to see some troops to-morrow. Sweet Huzy mine, I kiss & bless you without end & long for your caresses — the heart is so heavy. God be with you & help you evermore. Very tenderest, fondest kisses, sweet Beloved, fr. yr. very own
Wify.

Sleep well, dream of old Sunny. —

I hope Paul will be allright & not fidgety. Did the little Admiral answer you?


Above: Nicholas and Alexandra. Photo courtesy of Ilya Grigoryev at lastromanovs on VK.


Above: Alexandra with Alexei.

Monday, October 30, 2023

Alexandra's letter to Nicholas, dated September 6, 1915, and Nicholas's telegram and letter, dated September 6, 1915

Sources:

Letters of the Tsaritsa to the Tsar, 1914-1916, published by Duckworth & Co., 1923
The letter:

No. 114.
Tsarskoje Selo, Sept. 6-th 1915
Beloved Nicky dear,
Every morning & evening I bless & then kiss your cushion & one of your Images. I always bless you whilst you sleep & I get up to draw open the curtains. Wify sleeps all alone down here, & the wind is howling melancholy to-night. How lonely you must feel, wee One. Are your rooms at least not too hideous? Cannot N. P. or Drenteln photo them? All day impatiently I await your dear telegram wh. either comes during dinner or towards 11. —

So many yellow & copper leaves, & alas also many are beginning to fall — sad autumn has already set in — the wounded feel melancholy as they cannot sit out but rarely & their limbs ache when its damp — they almost all have become barometers. We send them off as quickly as possible to the Crimea.

Taube left yesterday with several others to Yalta as a surgeon must watch his wound & my little Ivanov's too. — Ania dined with me yesterday upstairs. To-day is Isa's birthday, so I have invited her with Ania to luncheon. — Oh beloved One — 2 weeks you left, — me loves you so intensely & I long to hold you in my arms & cover your sweet face with gentle kisses & gaze into your big beautiful eyes — now you cant prevent me from writing it, you bad boy.

When will some of our dear troops have that joy? Wont it be a recompense to see you! Navruzov wrote, he at last tried to return to his regiment after 9 months, but only got as far as Kars, his wound reopened again a fistula & he needs dressings, so once more his hopes are frustrated — but he begged Jagmin for work & he has sent him to Armavir with the young soldiers to train them & look after the youngest officers.

It is so nice to feel ones dear wounded remember one & write. Madame Zizi also often hears from those that lay in the big palace. —

Have you news from Misha? I have no idea where he is. Do get him to stop a bit with you — get him quite to yourself. — N. P. writes so contented & spirits up — anything better than town.

It seems Aunt Olga before coming to see me had flown half wild to Paul saying the revolution has begun, there will be bloodshed, we shall all be got rid of, Paul must fly to Goremykin & so on — poor soul! To me she came already quieter & left quite calm — she & Mavra probably got a fright, the atmosphere spread there too from Petrograd. —

Grey & only 5 degrees. — The big girls have gone to Church at 9 & I go with the others at 10½. — Isa has cought cold & 38 this morning, so has to keep in bed. The news is good again in the south, but they are quite close to Vilna wh. is despairing — but their forces are so colossal. — You wired you had written so I am eagerly awaiting your letter, Lovy — its sad only with telegrams in wh. one cannot give any news, but I know you have no time for writing, & when working hard to have still to sit down to a letter, thats dull & wearisome work; & you have every moment taken too, Sweetheart.

I had Markozov from 6¼ to 8 so have to write whilst eating — most interesting all he told & can be of use to abolish misunderstandings, cant write about anything of that to-night. — Old man came to me — so hard for him, ministers so rotten to him, I think they want to ask for their leave & the best thing too. —

Sazonov is the worst, cries, excites all (when it has nothing to do with him), does not come to the conseil des Ministers, wh. is an unheard of thing — Fred. ought to tell him fr. you that you have heard of it & are very displeased, I find. I call it a strike of the ministers. Then they go & speak of everything wh. is spoken of & discussed in the Council & they have no right to, makes him so angry. You ought to wire to the old man that you forbid one talking outside what is spoken of at the Council of Ministers & wh. concerns nobody. There are things that can & wh. are known later, but not everything. —

If in any way you feel he hinders, is an obstacle for you, then you better let him go (he says all this) but if you keep him he will do all you order & try on his best — but begs you to think this over for when you return to seriously decide, also Stcherbatov's successor & Sazonov. — He told Stcherbatov he finds absolutely a person chosen by Stcherbatov ought to be present at Moscou at all these meetings & forbid any touching of questions wh. dont concern them — he has the right as Minister of the Interior; Stcherbatov agreed at first, but after having seen people fr. Moscou he changed his mind & no more agreed — he was to tell you all this, Goremykin told him to — did he? Do answer. — Then he begs D. Mrazovsky. should quickly go to Moscou, as his presence may be needed any day. — I don't admire Yussupov leaving (its her fault) but he was not worth much. — And now we have left Vilna — what pain, but God will help — its not our fault with these terrible losses. Soon is the Sweet Virgin's feast 8-th (my day, do you remember Mr. Philippe) — she will help us. —

Our Friend wires, probably after her letter his wife brought, telling about all the interior difficulties. "Do not fear our personal embarassments, the protection of the Holy Mother is over you — go to the hospitals though the enemies are menacing — have faith." Well I have no fright, that you know. — In Germany one hates me now too He said & I understand it — its but natural. —

How I understand, how disagreeable to change your place — but of course you need being further from the big line. But God will not forsake our troops, they are so brave. —

I must end now, Lovebird. — Alright about Boris, only is it the moment? Then make him remain at the war & not return here, he must lead a better life than at Warshaw & understand the great honour for one so young. — Its a pitty, true, that not Misha.

The German nurses left for Russia, & Maria had no time to see them, me they did not ask to see, probably hate me. —

Oh Treasure, how I long to be with you, hate not being near, not to be able to hold you tight in my arms & cover you with kisses — alone in yr. pain over the war news — yearn over you. God bless help, strengthen comfort, guard & guide. —
Ever yr. very own
Wify.

Nicholas's telegram:

Telegram. Stavka. 6 September, 1915.
Thank you with all my heart for your letter and the flowers, which have arrived quite fresh. It is cold, rainy, stormy. I hope that in a few days the news from that place will be better. I kiss all fondly.
NICKY.


Above: Nicholas and Alexandra. Photo courtesy of Ilya Grigoryev at lastromanovs on VK.


Above: Olga, Tatiana, Maria and Anastasia. Photo courtesy of Ilya Grigoryev at lastromanovs on VK.


Above: Grigori Rasputin.


Above: Baroness Sophie "Isa" Buxhoeveden.


Above: Anna Vyrubova.

Note: Alexandra almost always referred to Grigori Rasputin as "our Friend".

Tuesday, February 7, 2023

Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden's account of Alexandra's visits to Headquarters (Stavka) and elsewhere, 1916

Sources:

The Life and Tragedy of Alexandra Feodorovna, pages 216 to 223, by Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden, 1928



Above: Alexandra with Alexei.


Above: Alexandra at Eupatoria. Photo courtesy of Ilya Grigoryev at lastromanovs on VK.



Above: Tatiana at Eupatoria. Photo courtesy of Ilya Grigoryev at lastromanovs on VK.



Above: Alexei with his friends from Mogilev. Photo courtesy of Ilya Grigoryev at lastromanovs on VK.


Above: Olga, Maria and Alexei with their friend Rita Khitrovo at Eupatoria. Photo courtesy of Ilya Grigoryev at lastromanovs on VK.



Above: Olga and Anastasia playing with peasant children.


Above: Olga and Tatiana with their grandmother, Dowager Empress Marie Feodorovna, at the opening of the British Red Cross Hospital.


Above: Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden.

The account:

The Empress was but rarely seen in Petrograd in the winter of 1915-1916. Her health was very uncertain, and she frequently had to interrupt her hospital work at Tsarskoe Selo. Her cherished plan of going to see the work of the Grand Duchess Olga Alexandrovna near the fighting line, and of paying a surprise visit to her ambulance trains, had to be given up. The Grand Duchesses Olga and Tatiana replaced their mother as much as they could. They went every week to Petrograd, the Grand Duchess Tatiana to preside at sittings of her Refugee Committee, and the Grand Duchess Olga to receive donations for her soldiers' families at the Winter Palace. Afterwards the young Grand Duchesses would wind up the afternoon by going to the different hospitals in Petrograd, which the Empress would have seen for herself had she been able.

The Grand Duchesses represented their mother at the opening of the British Red Cross Hospital, going with their grandmother, the Dowager-Empress. The Empress had taken the greatest interest in this hospital, and had had several conversations with Lady Muriel Paget, Lady Sybil Grey, and Mr. Malcolm, who were responsible for it. It was established in the Grand Duchess Serge's former Palace, then the property of the Grand Duke Dimitri Pavlovitch, and was equipped by the British Red Cross and very well run by English doctors and nurses. The Empress was able to pay a visit to the hospital before the unit left for the front. Lady Sybil Grey, who went with them, had the ill-luck, after a very short stay, to be hit in the face by a splinter of shell in the trenches near the firing line. She was sent back to Petrograd, and the wound healed well, but there was considerable anxiety felt for her at one time, and the Empress was full of sympathy.

In the spring of 1916 the Empress was able to resume her journeys through the country, though on a smaller scale than in the previous year. These journeys always finished now with a short visit to the Emperor at Mohileff, whither the Cesarevitch had also returned, after a time spent at Tsarskoe Selo recovering from his illness. The sun went out of the Empress's life when she was away from the Emperor, and since the Cesarevitch's last illness that winter her fears for him were never at rest.

The little Cesarevitch had "grown up" considerably through being in the Emperor's constant company. He slept in his father's room, for the house at Mohileff was a very small one, and lunched daily with him and his Staff, talking merrily to the Generals and the members of foreign military missions, forgetting his shyness. He was a great favourite with the officers, and the Empress always begged them not to spoil him, which would have been difficult, as he was a delightful boy. The old Belgian General, Baron de Riquel, and the Japanese military representative, who, in common with all his countrymen, was particularly fond of children, were his especial friends. He also made friends at Mohileff with two little boys, the sons of officers' widows in very modest circumstances. The Empress made the acquaintance of their mothers during her visits, and often sent special invitations to the little boys to come and play with her son, as she felt that he wanted companions of his own age.

The Empress took her four daughters with her on her journeys, and also to Mohileff, where the whole family rejoiced in being together. The Grand Duchesses needed a change from their hospital work. The Grand Duchess Olga Nicolaevna, especially, had so much overtired herself in the course of the winter that she had grown nervous and anaemic; had had to give up actual nursing and supervised the wards, though the Grand Duchess Tatiana still worked in the operating theatre. Large supplies of clothes for refugees were always taken on these journeys, which Tatiana Nicolaevna distributed.

For about ten days in the spring of 1916 the Emperor and the Empress travelled together in the south of Russia, the Empress inspecting hospitals and the Emperor reviewing troops. It was a terribly wet time and the Empress and her daughters went about in mackintoshes with well tucked-up skirts. They went over Her Majesty's sklad at Vinnitza, a small town near the Roumanian frontier, which had been excellently managed all through the war by Mme. de Hartwig, widow of the former Russian Minister to Serbia. This was the centre of all the Empress's stores and ambulances for the Galician front. Thence they went to Bendery, where the Emperor reviewed the Czecho-Slovak legions, formed from former Austrian prisoners of war, and the beginning of the Czecho-Slovak army; units of which, while returning to their own country through Siberia, were later on the first to help Admiral Kolchak in his fight against Bolshevism.

From Bendery they went to Odessa, where the Empress saw the sanatoria for officers set up in connection with the mud-baths of Odessa, and the first Russian iodine factory. Sebastopol was the next stop. They resisted the temptation to go to Livadia, though the doctors advised it for the Empress. It was, as she said, "too great a treat to indulge in during the war." As it was, the trip was a delightful one and did everyone good. The Empress revived, notwithstanding the fatigue, and the Grand Duchesses used to lie like lizards in the sun beside the train at Sebastopol, regardless of their mother's appeals to them to think of their complexions! At Sebastopol, where they had so often stopped in former years on their way to Livadia, they felt the spirit of war-time. There were scarcely any men about in the streets, as it was a naval town and they were all with the fleet. At night all the windows of the Imperial train had heavy, black curtains drawn across them. Every light was covered. All the town was plunged into pitch darkness, as German cruisers had entered the Black Sea, and air-raids were feared. The Empress and her daughters accompanied the Emperor as he visited the forts above the town; but they saw the fortifications at some distance, as the Emperor did not attempt to infringe the rule that no women were to be admitted inside the forts.

From Sebastopol the journey was continued to Eupatoria, where the Empress had established several sanatoria. Eupatoria was lovely, semi-Oriental, and bathed in sunshine, with glowing flowers overhanging the high white walls of gardens and houses, whose high railed windows proclaimed them to be the residences of Tartars. Eupatoria had not been visited by any Russian Emperor since the Liberal Alexander I, and all the population gave the Imperial Family a warm welcome. The Mahommedans even authorised the validé (their name for the Empress) and her daughters to attend a solemn thanksgiving service at the mosque, which no woman ever enters. It was quaint to see the rows and rows of prostrate turbaned men, their shoes all standing before the door. Not a word of the service could be understood, of course, except the Emperor's name occasionally. But their earnest faces, and the Oriental calm and discipline with which they all followed the Mollah in his every movement, made an impressive picture. After the Mahommedans, the Karaim Jews' Synagogue was visited. It was a lovely white marble building, covered with sweet-scented glycinia. A fine tenor chanted the Psalms in Hebrew — it was quite a picture of other centuries and another world.

Those were the lighter sides of the visit. The official side, including service at the cathedral, and visits to numerous hospitals had come first, and the day was brought to an end by a visit to Mme. Vyrouboff, who was undergoing treatment and staying in a seaside villa. Here all the family basked in the sun and forgot their cares for a few brief hours. Months afterwards, this one day in the quiet little town, with its marvellous sun, was remembered and cherished. They had had a few hours' relaxation and quiet there, and were very grateful for it.

In the summer of 1916 the Empress went several times to Mohileff. The whole party lived in the Imperial train, drawn up in the pine woods near the station. In the morning, while the Empress was resting, her daughters visited the cottages in the neighbourhood, played with the children of the peasants, and gave them sweets and presents. All went to luncheon with the Emperor in the house which, to his amusement, was pompously called "the Palace" by the people at Headquarters. It had formerly been the Governor's residence, and bore traces of the progressive bad taste of all the governors who had lived in it. Such hideous stuffs and such terrible imitation oak-grained wallpapers could rarely have been seen together; but the Emperor had other things to think of, and no changes were made.

All the members of foreign missions were invited to these luncheons, as well as the numerous Generals attached to Headquarters and any who came in from the front. The Empress told me that she always felt desperately shy at Headquarters. She had grown unaccustomed to making a big cercle and felt that she was out of her element in such purely masculine surroundings. When she stood in the corner of the room with her daughters, having given her hand to all to be kissed, the bright red spots on her cheeks were sure signs of her nervousness. While the Emperor was engrossed in conversation with some General, she would timidly send one of her daughters to call up someone to her, though she never had the opportunity of talking to some of those whom she would have appreciated most. Her neighbours at luncheon were generally the chiefs of the British and French Military Missions, at first Sir J. Hanbury-Williams and the Marquis de La Guiche, then General Waters and General Janin. She particularly liked Sir J. Hanbury-Williams and talked quite simply to him. He quotes in his book (The Emperor Nicholas II as I knew him) a remark she made to him at one of these luncheons: "War is the passing out of darkness into the light of victory, but victory we must have." This same feeling about victory can be seen in a letter to Princess Louis on December 10th, 1915: "Oh, how one longs for 1916 to bring us Allies glorious victories and peace!"

After luncheon the Imperial party would go out by motor, or down the Dnieper on a small steam launch to an appointed spot where the car or launch would be left, and the Emperor and his daughters, accompanied by the most intrepid walkers of the suite, would go off on a long expedition through the country. It was amusing to see some of the gentlemen lagging behind to avoid the inviting eye of the sovereign, for to the stout these walks were more of a pain than a pleasure. The Emperor walked through fields and woods and villages, once or twice even through private gardens when he missed his way. The surprise of a family of small landowners can be imagined when the whole Imperial party of some ten ladies and gentlemen walked through their garden, and appeared unexpectedly in front of the balcony where they were sitting round a steaming samovar enjoying their afternoon tea! The Emperor politely apologised for the intrusion, but was met with rather black looks. Then someone said "It is the Emperor", and all the flowers in the garden would have been pressed on the Grand Duchesses if the hospitable owners could have had their way.

Another time the young Grand Duchesses and I nearly fell into a pond from a raft on to which we had climbed to pick some water-lilies for the Empress, and had to be rescued by the Emperor, though he said he had never before provided Her Majesty with flowers under such difficult conditions.

The Empress stayed near the cars or by the river during these expeditions, with Mme. Vyrouboff, for she could not take long walks now. She liked to talk to passing villagers, and the conversation generally resulted in some private charity to the people who, at first, did not know who she was.

After the walk came tea, and then the Emperor had to return to his work. Sometimes people of special interest were invited, officers returning from the front, doctors, etc., and the suite, of course, were present. After tea, the ladies returned to the train, where the Emperor joined his family for dinner, going back immediately afterwards to his work again. About eleven o'clock tea was served again, in the Russian fashion, when the Emperor would reappear, to read the daily papers and drink the same number of glasses of tea each evening, while his daughters and the Grand Duke Dimitri Pavlovitch, who sometimes spent the evening with their Majesties, kept up a lively conversation together. The Grand Duke teased both mother and daughters, and the Empress was often laughing and talking as gaily as the girls, infected by the buoyant spirits of the young people. Only those members of the suite who were living in the train, and the two gentlemen who had come with the Emperor, were present at that last meal, and the conversation then was generally quite informal, and the Emperor commented on the news he had read.

It was said that the whole of Headquarters disliked the arrival of the Empress at Mohileff, as they had an idea that she influenced the Emperor much more than was really the case; and every appointment or every change that occurred after she had been there was laid at her door. This was not so.

I myself happen to have witnessed an incident that proves that the dismissal of Sazonoff, which has always been attributed to the Empress's influence and most bitterly commented upon, was not brought about by Her Majesty. I was with the Empress in her coupé in the train at Headquarters, when a note from the Emperor was brought in. The Empress read it with signs of the greatest surprise, and, on the spur of the moment, told me its contents. The Emperor wrote that he had decided to dismiss Sazonoff. This was news for the Empress, who seemed dubious, and expressed the opinion that she feared the moment was inopportune.

The last journey that the Empress took was in December 1916, when she went to Novgorod, a town she had longed to visit on account of its numerous beautiful old churches. Now she had no time to see these, as her visit was mainly to the war hospitals. The Governor escorted her round them, and the nobility gave a large tea party in her honour, but it was clear to those who were with her that there was no warmth in the welcome, though the Empress did not realise it. She managed to see some of the old church treasures, and the cathedral, and she went also with her daughters and the Prince Joan Constantinovitch to see an old Staritza, who was over a hundred years old, and much reverenced in the town. The old woman greeted her with the words: "Here is the martyr Empress Alexandra." Her Majesty seemed not to hear. She received the Staritza's blessing and went away, cheered and comforted; but those who had been with her came back depressed and apprehensive, for they felt the reception was an omen.

Monday, September 5, 2022

Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden's account of the nosebleed Alexei suffered in December 1915 and Alexandra's belief that Rasputin saved his life again

Sources:

The Life and Tragedy of Alexandra Feodorovna, page 215, by Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden, 1928


The account:

... On the day of Princess Orbeliani's funeral, the Emperor arrived unexpectedly from Headquarters with the little Cesarevitch, who was desperately ill. He had broken a blood-vessel in the nose, and all the doctors' efforts could not stop the haemorrhage, which had lasted for forty-eight hours. The poor child had had to be supported day and night in a half-sitting posture, and could scarcely speak. The Empress was in an agony. Always calm on the surface, she lived over again in remembrance the hours at Spala in 1912. Again the last remedy — the prayers of the Healer — was called for. The Staretz came, prayed for the child, touched his face, and, almost immediately after, the bleeding ceased. The doctors tried to explain the medical reasons for this, but the mother had seen that all their efforts had failed, and that Rasputine had succeeded. The Cesarevitch recovered, and the reputation of the Staretz as a man with heaven-sent powers stood higher than ever.


Above: Alexandra with Alexei.


Above: Grigori Rasputin.


Above: Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden.

Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden's account of Alexandra's friendship with Princess Sonia Orbeliani and Sonia's death in December 1915

Sources:

The Life and Tragedy of Alexandra Feodorovna, pages 213 to 215, by Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden, 1928


The account:

The death of the Empress's devoted lady-in-waiting, Princess Sonia Orbeliani, in December 1915, was, as well as being a great personal grief, a loss to her in other ways. Though she had been an invalid for years, Princess Orbeliani had the undaunted spirit of the Georgians. She did not give in, though she knew that her days were numbered, and kept to the last an intense interest in life. When she could no longer serve her beloved Empress actively, Princess Orbeliani did all she could to help her socially, putting her in touch with people who would interest her, and talking to her frankly, never fearing to give her an honest and even unfavourable opinion. She went about a great deal in her wheeled chair to houses where the voices of different parties were heard.

She was a niece of the former Liberal Prime Minister, Prince Sviatopolk-Mirsky. The Empress was devoted to Sonia, and knew her honesty and affection. Her Majesty did not easily change her opinion when it was once formed, but in discussing a subject with a person she trusted she could be persuaded in time to see the other point of view, and even to act on it later. Nothing that the Empress did, or did not do, brought about, or could have averted, the catastrophe of 1917. But had she had wiser advice during the critical years, she would have escaped the unjust accusation of influencing the politics of the country.

Sonia Orbeliani died after a short illness. The Empress never left her during the last day. She had promised her friend to close her eyes when she died, and she kept her promise. Sonia died in her arms, thanking her Empress and friend with her last smile for all she had been to her. The Empress saw to all details of the funeral, fulfilled her dear friend's last wishes, and wrote to all the relations herself. She came to the first memorial service (panichida) in her nurses' dress. "Don't be astonished to see us [the Empress herself and Olga and Tatiana Nicolaevna] dressed as sisters", she wrote me, "but I hate the idea of going into black for her this evening and feel somehow nearer to her like this, like an aunt, more human, less Empress." Late that same evening the Empress joined me in the room where the coffin lay. She sat down beside it, looking into the quiet, dead face, and stroking Sonia's hair, as if she were asleep. "I wanted to be a little more with Sonia", she said. When she left the room, her face was bathed in tears. She felt the loss of the "true heart", as she called Sonia in a letter to her sister, adding "All miss her sorely." ...


Above: Alexandra with Princess Sonia Orbeliani.


Above: Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden.

Tuesday, June 21, 2022

Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden's account of Alexandra's family life during year two of World War One (1915) and letting Alexei go to General Headquarters with Nicholas

Sources:

The Life and Tragedy of Alexandra Feodorovna, pages 210 to 212, by Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden, 1928


The account:

With the Emperor at Mohileff, twenty-six hours distant from the capital, life at the Imperial Palace became, if possible, even quieter. The whole place seemed dead. There was no movement in the great courtyard. We ladies-in-waiting went to the Empress through a series of empty halls. The Empress gave audience daily, but only to those people whom it was imperative to see, including a few on charitable business. Her latest bout of activity had exhausted her much more quickly than at the beginning of the war, and a month after the Emperor's departure, Her Majesty, though still going when possible to the Tsarskoe Selo hospitals, spent most of the day and all her evenings on her sofa, in a state of utter exhaustion. But no matter what was in her heart, she always had a smile for her children; they always found their mother interested in their doings. Her face would light up whenever the Emperor or one of her children came into the room. After dinner the Empress and her daughters sat together in the mauve boudoir, the children round her couch. One daughter would play the piano, another would read. When the Emperor was at Tsarskoe and had a moment's free time, he would read aloud, generally an English novel, which rested his brain. The young Grand Duchesses never seemed to feel the austerity of their lives, or expect the amusements that should have been theirs at their age. The only changes they had were an occasional concert got up at the hospital for the patients, or a small party at Mme. Vyrouboff's, to which the Empress sometimes accompanied them.

Mme. Vyrouboff had a charming little house near the Palace. She knew how to entertain simply and informally, and invited to those small parties a few intimate friends. Her sister, Mme. "Alya" Pistohlkors (married to the son of the Princess Paley by her first marriage) was generally there; Countess Emma Freedericsz, Mme. Dehn (Lily), Countess Rehbinder, née Mouwesz (looking very like the Empress in appearance, though shorter) as well as some young girls, Irina Tolstoy, Daly (Nathalie) Tolstoy, Marguerite Hitrovo, and some officers of the Imperial yacht, when they were on leave from the front.

The realities of war were known to the Empress. She heard accounts of life at the front every day at the hospitals, and from the reports of officers on leave she realised that the spirit that prevailed at the front was very different from that in the rear. The officers from the army were full of hope, energy and patriotic feeling. Those who had been some time in the Petrograd hospitals were dispirited and full of alarming tales.

The hope that the Emperor would be able to make short stays only at Headquarters could not be fulfilled. He did not return to Tsarskoe till October, and then only for a short time. When he was there the Palace sprang to life. Ministers came and went daily, carriages drove to and fro. He was satisfied that all was going well and was full of hope for the future. When the Emperor left, he took the Cesarevitch with him. He wanted the troops to know his heir. He also wanted his son to see at close quarters what war meant, so that he should be able to understand, in years to come, what the struggle had been and what it had cost Russia.

This was a terrible wrench for the Empress. She had never been parted from her boy for more than a few hours, except for one week on one of her inspection journeys. Every moment she was away from him she was filled with anxiety that something would happen, for the sword of Damocles was always hanging over his head. She made up her mind that she must make this, the greatest of all sacrifices. She would part with her peace of mind and let her treasure go; she was always anxious when her vigilant eye could not guard him. It was for her son's future and also for the Emperor's sake; he was often lonely at Mohileff, and the boy would cheer him up — but the look of anxiety never left her face from that day.


Above: Nicholas and Alexandra with Alexei.


Above: Olga, Tatiana, Maria and Anastasia.


Above: Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden.

Monday, June 6, 2022

Alexandra's letter to Nicholas, dated April 13, 1915, and Nicholas's telegram, dated April 14, 1915

Sources:

Letters of the Tsaritsa to the Tsar, 1914-1916, published by Duckworth & Co., 1923



The letter:

No. 65.
Tsarskoje Selo, April 13-th 1915
My very own Life,
Such a glorious, sunny morning! Yesterday I lay two hours out — shall lie out at 12 & I think after luncheon again. — The heart is not enlarged, the air & medicins are helping & I decidedly am feeling better & stronger, thank goodness. — To-morrow 6 weeks I worked last in the hospital. — The Commander of Baby's Georgian's sat with me for half an hour yesterday — such a nice man. Was before in the General staff, over the frontier guards in the Caucasus, singing highly the praises of his regiment & of poor Grabovoy — seems Mistchenko mentioned the young man 2 in his orders (he was to get the St. George's cross & sword, — the Commander presented him for both) — I got onto the sopha for dinner & remained till 1. —

Fancy only, there was a youngster in Olga Orlov's hospital Shvedov with the St. George's cross — there was something at the end louche about him, how cld. a Volunteer have an officer's cross, & to me he said he had never been a Volunteer quite a boy to look at — he left — one found german chiffres on his table — & now I hear he has been hung! Too horrid — & he begged for our signed photos. I remember; — how could one have got hold of such a mere chap! — Baby just brought one of those German arrows one drops fr. aeroplan[e]s — how hideously sharp — Romanovsky brought it (is he a flier?) & asked for Baby's card — the aeroplan[e] lies somewhere out here, Baby forgot fr. where it was brought. —

So now you are off to the South — did not get hold of your Generals? To-day perhaps in Odessa already — how brown you will get — I whisper a wish of Kirylls, wh. he told N. P. who repeated it, en passant to Ania (because thought he could not tell you) — that he hoped you would take him to Nikolaiev & Sebastopol — I only mention it like that, because I don't think you have any place for him.

Our dear sailors, how glad I am you will see them. —

Now you will find out how many plastuni battalions — & then I can send Images. —

Our Friend is glad you left for the South. He has been praying so hard all these nights, scarcely sleeping — was so anxious for you — any rotten vicious jew might have made a scandal.

Just got yr. wire fr. Proskurovo that is nice that you will see the Zaamursky frontier guards at Kamenetz-Podolsk. Really, this journey at last gives you more to see & brings you into contact with the troops.

I love to know you do and see unexpected things, not everything wh. is planned & marked out before — à la lettre — spontanious things (when possible) are more interesting. — What a lot you will have to write in your diary & only during stoppages. —

We only remained half an hour on the balkony, it got too windy & fresh. Received two officers after luncheon then Isa, after wh. Sonia over an hour, then Mme Zizi & at 4½ Navruzov, as want so much to see him again. —

I hope the rest of your journey will go off alright.

Goodbye & God bless & keep you, my Angel. I cover yr. dear face with kisses, & remain yr.
Ever very fondly loving old wife
Alix.

Bow to yr. Gentlemen.

On the 16-th is N. P.'s birthday.

Ask N. P. whether Nic. Iv. Tchagin who died, was brother of Iv. Iv. (General of Infantry) it says in Petrogr. I only know he had a brother in Moscou & one who died — an architect. —

Nicholas's telegram:

Telegram. Rasdoinaia. 14 April, 1915.
Warmest thanks for letter. To-day I saw our fine fellows [our beauties] in Odessa at a grand inspection. Visited two hospitals. Lovely summer-like weather. Kyrill is going to two other places. Tender kisses.
Nicky.


Above: Nicholas and Alexandra.


Above: Alexei.


Above: Sophie "Isa" Buxhoeveden.


Above: Sonia Orbeliani.


Above: Grigori Rasputin.

Notes: en passant = in passing.

"Our Friend" = Grigori Rasputin.

Antisemitism was rampant in Imperial Russia, especially in the upper classes. It was wrong then and it is wrong now.

à la lettre = to the letter.

Friday, April 1, 2022

Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden's account of Alexandra's work as a wartime nurse and other war work

Sources:

The Life and Tragedy of Alexandra Feodorovna, pages 190 to 197, by Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden, 1928


The account:

... The Empress never thought of her health. She braced herself to do more than ordinary human strength could manage. She seemed indefatigable, and her suite could scarcely keep up with her. ...

... At Tsarskoe Selo the Empress continued to work with the same feverish energy. She thought out a whole programme of work based on her experiences of the last war, but greatly changed and improved. She desired to adapt as many palaces as possible for hospital work, feeling that all available space was likely to be needed. The Petroffsky Palace at Moscow had already been turned into a hospital, the "Poteshny" was soon to follow. The Nicholas Palace, the former home of the Grand Duchess Serge, was a sklad. At Tsarskoe Selo, the Catherine Palace, where all the fêtes used to be given, was to be a hospital for officers. In the existing Court hospital the Empress and her daughters began their practical training. Princess Hedroits, a well-known surgeon, was at the head of the hospital. The Empress thought her daughters too young to nurse, and agreed to their request only on the understanding that they and she should go through a course of training. All three went through the usual probationer's course and could be seen every morning working at the hospital. Her Majesty was deft and very quick-handed, and brought to the work, what was far more precious to the patient, her understanding of suffering and her capacity for comfort. Neither mother nor daughters ever shirked the most fatiguing and difficult task. The Grand Duchess Tatiana showed special aptitude for the work. It had a scientific interest for her, apart from its human side.

Both young girls were very enthusiastic, and when they had passed their examinations insisted on going on with their hospital duties. The Empress did the same. It gave her moral satisfaction to feel that she was really working for the wounded, and her work made her forget the anxieties and sorrows that pressed on her. ...

Her soothing influence helped many a wounded man through the agonising moments before an operation, and many a dying soldier passed away happier for her presence. The humblest in her hospital, when he called for the Tsaritsa, would see her at his side. Sometimes she had only just come home when a message from her hospital would tell her that a specially bad case called for her. She would seize the first free moment to rush back to the hospital in her car. She visited the other hospitals at Tsarskoe Selo constantly, and those in St. Petersburg about once a week in that year. ...

Such sad cases always awakened the Empress's sympathy. There were several such unknown, solitary men, from obscure line regiments, who died in her hospital whose last hours were comforted by the Empress. She lost her shyness in her nurses' dress. She felt she was one of many, and to all in the hospital she showed herself in her true light and as her home circle knew her.

Many princesses wore nurses' dresses during the war, and in many cases the feeling that dictated this was admired and understood. To the general public, in Russia, however, and particularly to the uneducated mind, this was not the case. The Empress was advised not to wear nurses' dress when she went about the country during the war. She was unknown in the towns, and the people did not recognise her when she came without the usual apparel, and so the effect on the public of the Imperial visit was lost. ...

...

At the end of 1914 and the beginning of the following year the Empress again had a moment of great popularity. Even people who were not in sympathy with her admitted this: for instance, the Minister for Foreign Affairs, S. D. Sazonoff, spoke of it to me on one occasion when I was lunching at the Foreign Office in 1915. The Empress travelled about, she was seen in public, her work became known. "One must take things personally in hand," she had written to Princess Louis [Victoria] on March 23rd, 1915.

Neither the Red Cross nor the Commissariat could cope with the ever-growing demands of the hospitals for linen and supplies. The Empress arranged for her sklads to co-operate with these institutions, particularly in helping small military hospitals, close to the fighting line. She had sklads at Petrograd, Moscow, Odessa, and Vinnitza, and a whole line of lesser sklads in small towns near the front. Their sphere of activity became very wide. Supply trains and single carriages attached to empty ambulance trains took hospital material from the main sklads up to the fighting line. Automobile squads had been formed in Poland in connection with these trains, most of them being run by members of the great Polish families, who put their private cars at the disposal of the sklads. They did excellent work all through the war. The needs of the moment were what guided the Empress and her assistants. At the head of the Moscow sklad, which directed the whole work, was M. Nicholas de Meck, always called by the Empress "Uncle Meck," and his nephew V. V. Meck. The Petrograd sklads were organised by Princess E. N. Obolensky; Count Apraxine, the Empress's gentleman-in-waiting, was continually going with the trains to the front, to see how everything was working. To villages where there were no baths, the Empress had bath cars sent out, attached to the supply trains. These the soldiers greatly appreciated; they called these cars the "disinsection" cars — an apt mispronunciation of the word! In the winter warm clothing was supplied, as well as linen. In 1915, when the armies were more stationary, she arranged to send field churches. The country in which the fighting was taking place was Catholic, and there were few Orthodox churches. Priests went out with these portable churches, and were a great comfort to many dying men, unable to get into touch with the regimental priests.

New ideas were always working themselves out in the Empress's brain. The days were too short for her. ...

... She looked through the papers her secretary sent her till late at night, and began to work at them again, early in the morning, before going to her hospital. There was sometimes no chance for the Household to see her, except at lunch, and she usually had her ladies on business at that time.

It was evident that such feverish activity could not be kept up long by a woman so delicate as the Empress. Only sheer will-power kept her going during the first five months of the war. She fell ill in December 1914. Heart trouble reappeared, caused by the long standing and the real, hard physical work to which she was, naturally, unaccustomed, and by the motoring, which had always disagreed with her. Added to this was the mental strain of continual contact with suffering, in which she was always spending herself whole-heartedly in helping and comforting others. She roused herself at the time of her friend Mme. Vyrouboff's illness in January 1915, but afterwards had a serious setback, and could not leave the Palace for several weeks. She went on intermittently with her hospital work, being loth to give it up entirely, but she could stand it less and less. She hated to admit that she was beaten by her health, but in 1916 she was completely worn out.

The Empress Alexandra Feodorovna wrote to her sister that she was determined not to be "a mere doll." Every official in her trains near the fighting line could telegraph to her personally, reporting his movements and appealing to her in cases of difficulty. If action had to be taken promptly, the Empress telegraphed herself, stating the case and asking for the necessary measures to be taken as soon as possible. She hated formality and red tape, and she felt that the interests of the wounded should always come before everything else. Personal sympathies or antipathies did not influence her in her work.


Above: Alexandra with some of her patients.


Above: Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden.

Monday, February 28, 2022

Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden's account of Russia entering World War One and Alexandra's reaction to it, late July to August 2 (New Style), 1914

Sources:

The Life and Tragedy of Alexandra Feodorovna, pages 185 to 188, by Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden, 1928


The account:

The outbreak of the world war came as a terrible blow to the Empress. She seemed to have a presentiment of coming events; for she was most depressed when they left the Standart, on which she had gone with the Emperor to recover from the fatigues of the Presidential visit, and said to some of those with her that she knew it would be the last cruise they would all take together. She had a horror of war. The memories of the Russo-Japanese War, and of the troubles that had followed, were yet too fresh in her mind. The Emperor and she hoped to the last that some agreement might be reached. Though the Emperor did not distress her by giving her all the details of the Governmental discussion, she felt very anxious, but she still did not realise how tense the situation had become.

On the first of August the Empress and her daughters waited a long time for the Emperor to come down to dinner. As a rule he was very punctual, and the Empress felt that something serious must have happened. He was receiving the Minister for Foreign Affairs, M. Sazonoff, and the audience seemed to last inordinately long. When the Emperor came, it was with the news that Germany had declared war. At first the Empress could not grasp it. War! her nightmare! She knew the completeness of German organisation; she knew that Russia was not prepared for war at that moment; and that England had not yet joined Russia and France. She was in despair, but, then and always, she had the conviction that Russia would win in the end.

The moment of the declaration of war made her set up a wall in her heart between Germany and Russia. She was the Empress of Russia — Russian always in heart and soul. "Twenty years have I spent in Russia, half my life, and the happiest, fullest part of it. It is the country of my husband and son. I have lived the life of a happy wife and mother in Russia. All my heart is bound to this country I love," she once said to me during the war. People in Germany do not understand how the Empress came to adopt the Russian standpoint so completely, and became so thoroughly Russian in her views. The reason for it was her intense, passionate love for the Emperor. She considered herself as wholly belonging to him. His country was her country, as also his religion had completely become hers. She always gave herself up entirely to those she loved, and identified herself with them.

The thought of her brother and of his feelings at having to take part in a war where he would be in the other camp gave her acute pain, but she brought her will-power to bear to face the inevitable. She regarded the inexplicable telegram sent by the Emperor William, after his ambassador, Count Pourtales, had already handed the declaration of war to the Russian Foreign Minister, as an attempt to shift the responsibility for the outbreak of war on to the Emperor Nicholas, and was very indignant. The mystery of that telegram has never been explained. She expressed her opinion on the matter to the Cesarevitch's Swiss tutor, M. Pierre Gilliard, who quotes the conversation fully in his book, Thirteen Years at the Russian Court. According to her wont, the Empress did not remain content with lamentations. At ten o'clock at night on the day of the declaration of war, I came back from a drive, not knowing what had happened. My maid told me that a woman's voice from the Imperial villa had rung me up three times during the last hour, that it was either one of the Grand Duchesses or the Empress herself. I immediately rang up "Alexandria," the Emperor's villa, and found the Empress already at the telephone. In a voice broken by suppressed sobs, she told me of the event. "War is declared," she said. "Good Heavens, so Austria has done it!" I exclaimed. "No, no," she said, "Germany. It is ghastly, terrible — but God will help and will save Russia... But we must work... go at once to Mme. E. and speak to her about opening the workshop at the Hermitage. Then talk to my secretary and ring me up — no matter how late, or come round." She entered into details, getting calmer as she spoke, giving minute instructions. I spoke to the Empress again later. She was perfectly calm, having got over her momentary weakness.

The next day, August 2nd, the Emperor and Empress with their daughters — the little Cesarevitch was ill — went to St. Petersburg to attend a solemn Te Deum at the Winter Palace. This was an old custom that had been followed at the outbreak of the Japanese War. Crowds of people thronged the Winter Palace; they were in a very frenzy of patriotism. Ladies clung to the Emperor, kissing his hands. No one alive had seen such enthusiasm, which was reminiscent of 1812. At the outbreak of the Japanese War there had been some street demonstrations of students in the early days, but now the whole country was roused. The climax was reached when the Emperor, addressing the officers present, repeated Alexander I's promise of 1812 — not to conclude peace while a single enemy still remained on Russian soil. Sir George Buchanan, in his book, My Mission to Russia, quotes the words: "I solemnly swear not to make peace, as long as there is a single enemy on Russia's soil." Multitudes cheered in the streets, and when the Emperor and Empress appeared at the Palace windows, the whole crowd that thronged the huge square spontaneously knelt down and sang the National Anthem. ...

When the mobilisation was announced in the St. Petersburg military district, the Guards were the first to go. The Empress went to a Te Deum before her Lancer regiment left for the front, and said goodbye in person to all the officers and men. All through the war she followed the actions of this regiment, and after every battle in which the Lancers took part she helped all the families to get news. ...


Above: Alexandra.


Above: Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden.

Saturday, January 1, 2022

Excerpt from Alexandra's letter to Sophie Buxhoeveden, dated New Year's Eve 1917

Source:

The Life and Tragedy of Alexandra Feodorovna (1928), by Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden

The letter excerpt:

Thank God, we are still in Russia and all together.


Above: Alexandra.


Above: Sophie Buxhoeveden.

Saturday, December 25, 2021

Alexandra's diary entries for Christmas 1917, her last Christmas...

Source:

George Hawkins at Letters and writings of Nicholas II and his family on Facebook


The diary entries:

December 24 Sunday
Xmas Eve
Arranged presents.

12. Service in the house. Lunched downstairs. Dressed the trees, placed the presents. 4½ tea, then went to the guard 14th rifle regiment Malyshev 20 men. I brought them a small Xmas tree and eatables and a gospel each with a bookmark that I painted — sat there. 7½ dinner downstairs with all, Kolya too. One has forbidden Isa to come to us, or leave her house. 9 Xmas tree for the suite, all our people. 9½ Evening service, a large choir sang. Soldiers came too.

...

December 25 Monday
Xmas Day
Got up at 6¼. 7¼ Went to Church. After mass, moleben before the miraculous icon of the Abalatskaya Mother of God. Painted and rested. 12 lunched downstairs. Saw Isa at the window. Sat for 10 m. on the balkony whilst N cleared the snow away. 4½ tea, Kolya too. The others had their repetition, I looked on then rested. 8 Dined downstairs, Kolya too. N read to us.


Above: Alexandra.

Alexandra's letter to Sophie Buxhoeveden, dated Christmas 1917

Sources:


The Life and Tragedy of Alexandra Feodorovna (1928), by Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden

The letter:

Со Святым Рождеством тебя, дорогая Иза! Нежно целую тебя и желаю всего самого лучшего. Пусть Господь пошлет тебе хорошее здоровье и душевный мир, который является величайшим даром для нас, смертных. Мы должны молить Бога и о терпении, ведь оно так необходимо нам в этом мире страдания (и величайшего безумия), — об утешении, силе и счастье. Возможно, слова «радостное Рождество» звучат сейчас как насмешка, но ведь эта радость относится к рождению нашего Господа, Который умер, чтобы спасти всех нас, — и разве же не способно это восстановить нашу веру в безграничную милость Господа? Он надо всем, и Он во всем: Он проявит Свою милость, когда выпадет срок, а до этого мы должны терпеливо ждать. ...

English translation (from source 2):

A blessed Xmas to you, Iza dearest! And a loving wish and kiss. Above all, I wish God to give you good health, peace of mind, "doushevny mir", which is the greatest gift. We can ask for patience, which we all need in this world of suffering (and utter madness), consolation, strength and happiness. A "joyful Xmas" might sound like mockery, but it means joy over the New-born King, who died to save us all, and does that not renew one's trust and faith in God's infinite mercy? He is so far above all, is All in all: He will show mercy, when the right time comes, and we must patiently and resignedly await His good will. We are helpless to mend matters — can only trust, trust and pray and never lose faith or one's love to Him. Prayed for you, and shall again at mass — too hard you cannot go. I so hoped by a side door to another church. The Emperor and all the children send many a message and good wish. They share my regret. God bless you. Won't you look out of your window and tell Nastinka [Countess Hendrikoff] when? At one, let's say, and then we can peep at the corner window, and perhaps catch a glimpse of you. Just off to church! God bless and protect you. A loving kiss from your affectionate A. A happy Xmas to Miss Mather.


Above: Alexandra.


Above: Sophie Buxhoeveden.

Note: "doushevny mir" (душевный мир) = "peace of soul".