Alix's letter to Nicholas of May 17 and 18 (New Style), 1894

Source:

Alexandra Feodorovna: Diaries and Correspondence, volume 2: Engagement and Marriage, 1894, pages 60 to 62, by George Hawkins, 2023

The letter:

No. 18
Windsor Castle
May 17th 1894 11. evening
Моя душки Ники,
I must just begin a few lines to you to-night, to say how much my thoughts are with you. Sandra was with me a moment and so we sang "noch a mal" and it has made me feel quite melancholy. I cannot describe my longing for you, it is so great and just on your dear Birthday, how much I should have enjoyed spending it with you. God bless you my beloved Boy, and may you sleep well to-night and wake up fresh and happy in the morning, ready to begin the new year with a bright and cheery spirit. A good kiss for yr dear letter the servant brought me when we were leaving for Aldershot. All you said touched me deeply and the sweet flowers, yr an Angel, my Ники dear!

No, to think you can manage to get away earlier, I am too enchanted. By then I hope to have finished my cure and Victoria wishes me to tell you that she would be only too happy if you came to Walton. Fancy how delightful, if we could spend a few days there to-gether, it is too good to think of.

Do send me the books by the next messenger so that I can read them at Harrowgate. As soon as I know my address there, I will send it to you, Baroness Starkenburg, don't forget.

My own sweet precious one, yr dear letter has made me so happy, I feel like quite another person — a month and so Gott will, I shall clasp you to my heart, my Ники sweet.

The parade was charming and interested me immensely — the march past was so good — what splendid horses they have got, the one regiment only, greys, and so fine, they are much bigger than our German cavalry horses, but they are splendid, strong animals. The red uniforms do look so cheery. It was hot, but luckily not dusty, a thing they complain of here usually. The pole of our carriage broke, Victoria repaired by cords and we dreaded every moment that the steeds wld go off and leave us and carriage behind. Uncle George and U. Bertie were there too. We took tea at Uncle Arthur's. They want us to come so much when you are here. Altogether you are wanted by everyone, and it seems I am calmly to give you up to all the grasping creatures, oh, so naughty, I want you, I too am greedy and want my precious one all to myself sometimes.

The heat in the train was great and Sandra kept pulling the blinds the whole time up and down as the sun shone once in Granny's eyes and then on the other side.

Madelaine is hunting for the dog. I heard him bark a few minutes ago and now he has disappeared, frightened little beasty. But I think I better stop as it is getting so late and my legs are exhausted and I don't want the old Cow to grumble at the owl, only felt I must scratch down a few words as I cannot keep my thoughts away from you.

The moon is shining gloriously and I see two faces in it kissing each other, since I once discovered it from a drawing after a picture, il baccio della Luna — I always see the two heads. I traced it so can show it you at Darmstadt and you will distinctly ever after see the two faces.

At last she has got the dog.

Aunt B, Sandra, Ludwig and Victoria are riding to-morrow morning at 8, oh, how I envy them. I have lent the latter my riding habbit and a loose jacket so I hope she can wear parts of it. Bless you my love, my one and all, my sweet old boysy, have sweet dreams and think of your little bride who will pray most fervently for her Ники's happiness and wellfare. Night night deary!

May 18th — Good day, my beloved Nicky and tenderest good wishes and many happy returns of this dear day — how I long to be with you, I need not say, you can well imagine it. I received several kind telegrams, wh touched me deeply. From yr regiment, Aunt Sanny, Anastasie, Ella and Serge, Costia and Mavra. Your dear letter has come. I always scamper off to my room after lunch to find the daily letter I always am dying for. A kiss and tender thanks for it. I do pity you having had to spend some days in St Petersburg, the weather is so warm. That poor officer fainting in Church! The letters do take so long — why by this time, you are again at Gatchina and all is over.

It is glorious weather to-day, so sunny and warm. I studied Russian in the garden with Schneiderlein. I wish I got on quicker, I fear she must have great patience and perseverance with me.

Aunt B has given me already now her birthday present — a thing to hang all my crousseau — it looks so nice.

I shall send this letter off now and perhaps I can scribble a line for the last post to-night, I'll see.

Goodbye my own beloved Nicky dear, my thoughts are ever with you and more especially so to-day, and my most earnest prayers for yr happiness dearest pet. God bless you. Many tender kisses. Ever yr own true love
Alix

Du, mein ein & mein alles, mein Herz, mein Schatz

Above: Nicholas and Alix.

Notes: "Моя душки Ники" = "My darling Nicky".

"Du, mein ein & mein alles, mein Herz, mein Schatz" = "You, my one and my only, my heart, my darling".

Alix's letter to Nicholas, dated May 8 (New Style), 1894

Source:

Alexandra Feodorovna: Diaries and Correspondence, volume 2: Engagement and Marriage, 1894, pages 24 to 27, by George Hawkins, 2023

The letter:

No. 7

Windsor Castle

May 8th 1894

My милый, дорогой Ники,

Здравствуйте! I am just back from breakfast with Grandmama. Aunt Vicky sent a long letter of Sophie's — poor things, it must be too terrible in Greece, these incessant shocks. She said what had made such a curious impression when on Good Friday night the procession in the streets with the carpet and candles, all sang out Lord have mercy on us! No really it must be too fearful for words living in the constant dread of being shattered to atoms. It is as tho' they were being punished for some great sin, one cannot understand it. But God knows best why He is inflicting them with this misfortune and tho' we seem to think it cruel, what sorrows this life does bring and what great trials, how difficult to bear them patiently, and then again we are not half grateful enough for the joys this life brings us. Darling, I am sure these five years have been good for both of us, I only know they have made me think of God far more than I did before. Suffering always draws one nearer to God, does it not, and when we think of what Jesus Christ had to bear for us, how little and small our sorrows seem in comparison and yet we fret and grumble and are not patient as He was.

Oh my love, I wish I had you always by my side, how you might help me and teach me to be a better creature — I am not half worthy of you. I have still so much to learn, that is why I also say, do not let us marry just yet, tho' separation is hard, it is better not to hurry. And think only of the Religious question, you cannot expect me to know and understand it all immediately and to know a thing only half, is not right, and I must know the language a bit, so as to be able to follow the services a little.

To-day Georgie's answer came but sent to Aunt Alix, as I had simply signed Alix, he of course did not think of me.

Well the Staals dined last night and were most amiable and the Italian Ambassador and wife. He had been long ago in St Petersburg and his wife is Russian — good heavens how she chattered, one did not know any more where one's head was. We eat white bait and I longed to send you my plate, flying over the sea. I have got a large thing to burn and paint for Granny's Birthday on May 24th and I don't know how to get it done as I have had as yet absolutely no time and my legs ache fiendishly. Now Louise Aribert has telegraphed to her Parents that she is coming to them on the 25th so there is no room for me. I am sorry as it would have been nice, but perhaps Granny will allow me to go earlier for four days.

Still no news of Frl. Schneider. I wish Ella would let me know. I have been for 10 minutes with Gretchen — it is close and yet windy, not enjoyable weather. Oh, I do so long for a letter from you, they take such ages to come. I wonder if you have very much to do, my old, sweet thing. The ink is so watery that one makes blotches perpetually, too dirty, o tho' [illegible].

Aunt Alix and the 2 girls are coming to luncheon — poor Victoria — God bless her and may He some day make her happy, she deserves it, the dear Child, and little Maudy too. When one is happy, one longs to see others also joyous and grieves one cannot do anything for them — don't you too?

Some German lines I think so pretty, and which are set to music by F. Liszt.

"Es muss ein Wunderbares sein

Ums Lieben zweier Seelen,

Sich schliessen ganz einander ein,

Sich nie ein Wort verhehlen,

Und Freud und Leid und Glück und Not

So mit einander tragen;

Vom ersten Kuss bis in den Tod

Sich nur von Liebe sagen."

This moment I received your sweet letter, for which very fondest thanks and many a loving kiss. You cannot think how intensely happy it has made me, and that your Parents have agreed. Oh, you sweet boy, my own, my precious darling, my Nicky dear. I feel another being since your letter has come and all the dear words and little flower. God bless you my love.

You naughty thing, how dare you say that about the sly look and the house on the left!!!! Be ashamed of yourself, I wish I were there to pinch you for it.

The monogram on your paper does for me A H Hessen. This monogram I have stamped on the papers with a thing that belonged to darling Mama, that is why it has got the English crown.

I can see all the people running in to your room, how happy they must be to have you back again and how you must rejoice being home again — home, "there is no place like home" how true it is — and then to think that it is some day to also be the old owl's, I can scarcely believe it.

Aunt Alix and the three girls have left again, they were very dear, especially Victoria. She is going to write to you. They dine on Thursday at Buckingham Palace so I shall see them there. They are greatly looking forward to seeing you — how they all love you, well, I think I can understand it — you old beast, you make a rumpus in our heart.

The wind is howling and the grey clouds are collecting to-gether, so I fear we shall be douched out driving with Granny.

No, I am so happy with your angelical letter and only wish I could write such nice ones. And you all take nice walks to-gether, the whole happy family. Yes, indeed, I miss the inevitable Rosenau so much, tho' we grumbled then, now I look back upon those afternoons and long for them again.

Sweet Boy, I must say goodbye now, with many a tender kiss and fond blessing, I remain

Ever yr deeply devoted little girly

Alix

To-morrow we are off to London so my next letter will be from there — how I shall rejoice if the postman brings me a letter every day, or is it expecting too much!

Above: Nicholas and Alix.

Notes: "My милый, дорогой Ники, здравствуйте!" = "My dear, sweet Nicky, hello!".

"Es muss ein Wunderbares sein

Ums Lieben zweier Seelen,

Sich schliessen ganz einander ein,

Sich nie ein Wort verhehlen,

Und Freud und Leid und Glück und Not

So mit einander tragen;

Vom ersten Kuss bis in den Tod

Sich nur von Liebe sagen." =

"How woundrous it must be

When two souls love each other,

Locking each other wholly in,

Never concealing a single word,

And sharing with each other

Joy and sorrow, weal and woe;

Talking only of love

From the first kiss unto death."

(Translation by Richard Stokes, author of The Book of Lieder (Faber, 2005).

Alix's letter to Nicholas, dated May 7 (New Style), 1894

Source:

Alexandra Feodorovna: Diaries and Correspondence, volume 2: Engagement and Marriage, 1894, pages 23 to 24, by George Hawkins, 2023

The letter:

No. 6

Windsor Castle

May 7th 1894

My love,

A tender kiss and fondest thanks for you[r] dear note I received this morning. How very long it took coming from the frontier. It was sweet of you writing from there, as you must have been rather exhausted after the heat.

This morning, I drove with Gretchen to Cumberland Lodge to see Aunt Helena, snipe and family. I drove two ponies — if only we may be allowed to drive to-gether, but I doubt it very much indeed as Granny is very old fashioned about engaged people and most particular.

It is warmer and sunny but high wind at the same time. Victoria and Louis have left again for Walton, and Liko to Cowes for his health. I have still not yet heard anything about Frl. Schneider and am anxious to know when she is coming.

There is a "charming" "young" Lord Waiting here and he seems to like to speak to the owl. Think of our Coburg young R. Do you order me to make myself available with him, or wld Granny — you be shocked and offended? Eh? You great goose. I fear you know you are safe with yr Spitzbub, and so she cannot teaze you. I do so long for you, but it will be a little comfort when I hear oftener from you.

To-night the Staals are coming and an other ambassador and the Cumberland Lodge family. Last night young Arthur Hardinge dined. His sister is Maid of Honour, but going to marry soon and his Aunt was Lady in Waiting to dear Mama. He kissed hands on his appointment as minister at Zanzibar where he is going next week. I think they liked him at St Petersburg, at least he was very happy there — he enjoyed so traveling with you in India, only grieved it was so short. Anybody who knows my sweet Darling interests me of course doubly. I am spelling impossibly I find to-day, but you will excuse my faults, won't you and not be too severe judge but one has one's days, when one cannot write properly.

Precious one, I love you, oh, so dearly, and cannot tell it you often enough. I feel deep and strongly but have learned in the years to swallow my feelings down, so that now I cannot show them properly, but you understand yr silly old Pelly, don't you?

We read Sophie's discriptions of the earthquake, they must have been too ghastly for words — all those innocent little children crushed in the Church — one cannot bear to think of it, it is too terrible.

I wonder how the Weeping Willow is celebrating his birthday down at Abastouman? Granny was speaking of yr cossack suit, how fine it was, I think she remembered your father in it, but has never seen you wear it, so I told her you were bringing it here.

I must dress now for driving with Granny. Goodbye and God bless you, my own precious Nicky and let your little girl kiss you most tenderly.

Your very loving and devoted affectionate and trusting

Alix

Love to Xenia and Sandro

Above: Nicholas and Alix.

Alix's letter to Queen Victoria, dated August 1, 1893

Source:

Alexandra Feodorovna: Diaries and Correspondence, volume 1: Princess of Hesse, 1872-1893, pages 299 to 300, by George Hawkins, 2023

The letter:

Wolfsgarten
August 1st 1893
My darling Grandmama,
I am sending You these lines to tell You that Ernie is getting on nicely and that the Dr is quite satisfied. I hope that not before long he may be able to be put on the sopha, as lying always in the same position is most tiring. Poor boy, it is a great difference for him after the gay time in England, but he is most good and patient. He sleeps and eats well, wh is a great thing.

Since a few days we have had cold, rainy weather, such a change after the heat.

I have just heard from Victoria, who says they will be at Jugenheim on Thursday. I am so glad as she has been away so long. Aunt Julie and Franzjos came to tea yesterday and they seem to have enjoyed their visite to Paris.

Kissing Your dear Hand most affectionately, I remain Ever Your very loving deeply devoted and dutiful Child
Alix
Ernie sends much love

Above: Alix. Photo courtesy of TatianaZ on Flickr.

Above: Ernie.

Above: Queen Victoria.

Alix's letter to Queen Victoria, dated December 22, 1892

Source:

Alexandra Feodorovna: Diaries and Correspondence, volume 1: Princess of Hesse, 1872-1893, pages 288 to 289, by George Hawkins, 2023

The letter:

December 22nd 1892
My darling Grandmama,
I send you my most loving thanks for Your dear letter, which Bäuerlein brought me, You must please forgive my not having answered it before now, as also Your other kind note, but I was not well enough. I am so much better now, only must be still careful — I shall certainly do as You wish and consult an other Doctor, a specialist. Dr. Eigenbrodt thinks it also a very good thing I should do so. It is such a nuisance having perpetually something, and people imagine immediately it being something terrible, which is not in the least the case.

It was such a pleasure having dear Ella here, but alas her stay was too short.

The Christening went off beautifully yesterday, and the dear little Baby was so good and quiet, only smiling, and quite awake.

We leave to-morrow evening for Kiel, one dreads Xmas and the beginning of a new year as that is just the time one longs to have all one's dear ones close by, and one feels the loss of those that have been taken away, more than ever.

I wish we could have taken Victoria with us, but she did not like traveling at this time of year with such a small Baby. We shall be back next week, so as to begin the New Year here.

I have worked You an other chair, like the one I gave You on Your Birthday, and hope You will find it useful for one of the cottages. The little card is to bring You my most tender good wishes for Xmas.
Kissing Your dear Hand most affectionately, I remain, Beloved Grandmama,
Ever Your most loving and dutiful Child,
Alix

Above: Alix.

Above: Queen Victoria.

Alix's letter to Queen Victoria, year 1887

Source:

Alexandra Feodorovna: Diaries and Correspondence, volume 1: Princess of Hesse, 1872-1893, page 17, by George Hawkins, 2023

The letter:

... We felt so sad to leave you and dear Aunty and we shall never forget our long and pleasant stay with you and all your great kindness.

It seems so strange to find ourselves here without Papa and miss you both very much. Victoria is here till tomorrow and is looking well.

We have been busy unpacking some of our pretty photos and nice remembrances of the Jubilee year.

I hope you enjoyed your drive with the [illegible] after we left.

We think of you very often and all the happy days we spent together and will always look back with gratitude to your tender care of us.
I am Dearest Grandmama
Your loving and thankful child
Alix

Above: Alix.

Above: Queen Victoria.

Alix's letter to Queen Victoria, dated June 10, 1882

Source:

Alexandra Feodorovna: Diaries and Correspondence, volume 1: Princess of Hesse, 1872-1893, page 11, by George Hawkins, 2023

The letter:

Kranichstein
June 10th 1882
Dearest Grandmama
I thank you very much for my nice watch — I like it so much. I will try to always be a good girl. Please do not be angry that I did not write for your birthday. I am so sorry you minded it. Victoria helps with this letter. I hope soon to be able to write one alone. This is my new photograph, I have not got one yet of Victor Erbach.
Goodbye dearest Grandmama
I remain
Your loving Grandchild
Alix

Above: Alix.

Above: Queen Victoria.

Excerpt from Queen Victoria's letter to Alix's sister Victoria, after the deaths of Alix's mother Princess Alice and younger sister May (Marie), dated December 29, 1878

Source:

Alexandra Feodorovna: Diaries and Correspondence, volume 1: Princess of Hesse, 1872-1893, page 8, by George Hawkins, 2023

The letter excerpt:

December 29th 1878
... Think always (as you do) how blessed & happy precious Mama is now — with Frittie and darling May & her own dear father! ...

Above: Alix and her sisters in mourning for their mother Princess Alice.

Above: Princess Marie (May), who had died of diphtheria shortly before Alice, and Friedrich "Frittie", who suffered from hemophilia and died from a brain hemorrhage after falling from a window in 1873.

Above: Queen Victoria.

Above: Princess Victoria.

Alexandra's postcard letter to Gretchen von Fabrice, dated January 19/31, 1900

Source:

Alix und Gretchen: Briefe der Zarin Alexandra Feodorowna an Freiin Margarethe v. Fabrice, aus den Jahren 1891-1914 (2002), published by Heinrich, Count of Spreti

The postcard letter:

My sister has come for ten days which is a great joy to me. My Cousin is also still here. I hope Baby is getting on well. I have so long not heard nothing from you. we have snow every day. Best love from A.

Above: Alexandra. Photo courtesy of Ilya Grigoryev on Flickr.

Queen Victoria's letter to Alix's sister Victoria, dated February 2, 1887

Source:

Advice to my grand-daughter: Letters from Queen Victoria to Princess Victoria of Hesse, edited by Richard Hough, 1975

https://www.facebook.com/groups/princealbertandqueenvictoria/posts/1726222214240250/

The letter:

Osborne Feb 2 1887

Darling Victoria

It is impossible for me to tell you what a shock your letter gave me! Indeed I felt quite ill — for I am so deeply hurt at Irene's conduct towards me which is neither kind grateful or straightforward. I spoke to her on the subject not long before she left, and she said "I don't say it is never to be, only don't bind yourself before he goes away on a long voyage — but say you cannot as yet give a promise." And she assured me again and again that she would never do that! How can I trust her again after such conduct? Loving her as I do, treating her and you all as my own children and having to a great extent acting a mother's part to you all and been so very intimate with her, this want of openness has hurt me deeply. The least she could have done would be to telegraph at once to me: 'Henry is coming after all'. But to learn it from the papers first is too much........ It reminds me of Ella's and Serge's marriage (which I grieve over as much as ever) and that you were made to announce it to me as (I suspect) no one else liked to do it, just as she had declared she would not accept him!! ........ It is too bad to act in that way. I dare hardly hope for better things for lovely Alicky tho' I still have lingering hopes left there!

Above: Alix.

Above: Queen Victoria.

Above: Victoria.

Alexandra's letter to her sister Victoria, dated August 25, 1915

Source:

The Life and Tragedy of Alexandra Feodorovna by Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden, 1928

The letter:

Times are awfully hard, in every sense of the word, but one lives, hoping in God's infinite mercy.

Above: Alexandra. Photo courtesy of Ilya Grigoryev at lastromanovs on VK.

Alexandra's letter to her sister Victoria, dated September 1915

Source:

The Life and Tragedy of Alexandra Feodorovna by Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden, 1928

The letter:

Nicky will take over the command, General Alexieff will have the chief work to do, as head of Nicky's staff. He will guide the whole thing here as the other place [Mohileff] is still further off and then he will constantly go and see the troops and know what's going on at last. ... It's a heavy cross Nicky takes upon himself, but with God's help it will bring better luck.

Above: Alexandra. Photo courtesy of Ilya Grigoryev at lastromanovs on VK.

Above: Nicholas. Photo courtesy of Ilya Grigoryev at lastromanovs on VK.

Alexandra's letter to her sister Victoria, dated August 31, 1915

Source:

The Life and Tragedy of Alexandra Feodorovna by Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden, 1928

The letter:

They are advancing at great speed. Our misery, the lack of rifles and heavy artillery, like theirs. They bring more and more to our side. Will England and France never help us? We leave the fortresses, nothing can withstand 16-inch guns — old fortresses after all — and to lose lives uselessly is no good. The further they come the worse for them — the getting out. Must hope for an early, cold winter. We were not prepared for war and they were thoroughly, and then, they are splendid at organizing things, laying lines and so on, but God will help! The misery of the thousands of fugitives, who block up the rear! One does what one can for them, but the quantity is so colossal.

Above: Alexandra. Photo courtesy of Ilya Grigoryev at lastromanovs on VK.

Alexandra's letter to her sister Victoria, dated May 11, 1915

Source:

The Life and Tragedy of Alexandra Feodorovna by Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden, 1928

The letter:

How too outrageous the sinking of the Lusitania. There are things one cannot understand. ... An officer died on the table. A very difficult operation succeeded, then the heart gave way. Hard such moments, but my girlies must know life, and we go through all together.

Above: Alexandra. Photo courtesy of Ilya Grigoryev at lastromanovs on VK.

Alexandra's letter to her sister Victoria, written in April or May 1915

Source:

The Life and Tragedy of Alexandra Feodorovna by Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden, 1928

The letter:

I would to God, that this hideous bloodshed would end — but it is too early. The work is not yet done, and they still underrate us. One day they advance, the next we, and on the other side too.

Above: Alexandra. Photo courtesy of Ilya Grigoryev at lastromanovs on VK.

Alexandra's letter to her sister Victoria, dated April 30, 1915

Source:

The Life and Tragedy of Alexandra Feodorovna by Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden, 1928

The letter:

Nicky was at Lwoff [Lwów] and Peremyschel [Przemyśl] — most interesting. He has not yet returned as he went to Odessa, Sebastopol to see the troops, dockyards, etc. We expect him back in about 5 days. But spies are everywhere! Going to Bielostock, one threw masses of bombs from the aeroplanes on that town — railway — on Olga's sanitary train too. In time Nicky turned off — so filthy!

Above: Alexandra. Photo courtesy of Ilya Grigoryev at lastromanovs on VK.

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Alexandra's letter to her sister Victoria, dated March 23, 1915

Source:

The Life and Tragedy of Alexandra Feodorovna by Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden, 1928

The letter:

Such gratitude fills one's heart, that Peremyschel [Przemyśl] has fallen at last. Now one can breathe freer, as it kept many troops which we needed to send elsewhere. Thank God, on all sides the news is better and in France too. One's heart suffers for the ships in the Dardanelles — such an ignoble way of fighting. I loathe these mines. Three minutes and all over — brave souls. How glorious, when St. Sophia will be again a Christian church, if we live to see it.

Above: Alexandra.

Alexandra's letter to her sister Victoria, dated October 21, 1914

Source:

The Life and Tragedy of Alexandra Feodorovna by Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden, 1928

The letter:

One's heart bleeds, such misery, such losses. The worst is, when one cannot get the news about the losses for ages. From home, no news, of course. Mavra returns to-morrow, after burying her poor son, Oleg. It's one's consolation to be with the wounded and dress their wounds and look after them. All are well here. Ducky is out with Miechen's sanitary train, not as a nurse but to look after all, and works well. Olga and Marie are still out in the hospitals.

Above: Alexandra.

Alexandra's letter to her sister Victoria, dated November 25, 1914

Source:

The Life and Tragedy of Alexandra Feodorovna by Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden, 1928

The letter:

To-day is our Ernie's birthday, the first time in his life that three sisters can give him no news. How lonely he must be away from his dear ones, in a foreign country and hating the war. ... One's heart bleeds, thinking of all the misery everywhere and what will be afterwards! The amount of lies, printed in the German papers (and in Turkey), is sickening. The fright of the German prisoners that they were going to be shot, and noses and ears chopped off, and their surprise and contentment, when they are well treated and fed, are great. Ella will return in a few days from Lwoff. She wired that she was in the Carpathen, that there was snow in Lwoff and bitterly cold. Contented with what she saw and my sklad there and my four sklad trains working.

Above: Alexandra.

Note: sklad (склад) = military depot.

Alexandra's letter to her sister Victoria, dated March 23, 1915

Source:

The Life and Tragedy of Alexandra Feodorovna by Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden, 1928

The letter:

One must take things personally in hand. ... My heart got so bad again, there was lots of work, and it helps me when the heart is heavy and, knowing you bring happiness, how not go to the poor wounded? and forget yourself? My day was like that: at 9.30, a second into the Znamenia church to get my blessing for the day's work, then with Olga to the Big Palace to see a very seriously wounded officer (through the lungs). At 10 Tatiana fetched us (after her lesson) and they dropped me at Ania's. At 10.30-1, we worked at our hospital, with officers and men, and operations, rather often appendicitis, etc., too. Then I would go and sit with that poor officer again, for an hour or more, then pass through the other wards. After tea rested, if did not have audiences or officers to bid goodbye, before returning to the war. After dinner, off to Ania or to the hospital, or to both according to necessity. Now my poor officer died, and that finished me off, besides had to go to town to a hospital, and so on.

Above: Alexandra with patients in the hospital.