Sources:
Alexandra Feodorovna: Diaries and Correspondence, volume 2: Engagement and Marriage, 1894, pages 57 to 58, by George Hawkins, 2023
The letter:
4/16 Мая. 1894.
No. 14.
PALAIS ANITCHKOFF.
ST. PETERSBOURG.
My own sweet love,
All day I have been waiting for a letter & it never came. What could have happened to it? My darling, you have been spoiling me so these days, that now when I don't get any news from you, that makes me anxious & even sad! — It has been a most tiring day I ever remember and so awfully hot, that you must excuse this scribble being tiresome & ramoli, like myself! I am sitting in nothing else but my shirt all the windows write open though it's night & bad perfumes make my nostrils dilate for a bit of fresh air! I never came home since we left the house at 10. in the morning until 8. in the evening! It was poor aunt Katty's funeral that kept us ever so long on our legs. We walked in the procession from her palace to the fortress, where she was buried after a service of 2 hours. This time I thought my legs were beginning to grow out of my head! Then Papa & Mama left straight for Гатчина & I drove to Kosty's house & lunched with him & his wife. I went upstairs to aunt Sanny, who was most kind & touching. She said she loved you the more that you had consented after such a long & desperate struggle — which I agree fully with! And then in everything she said about you - it was so loving, so true & so kind. Really you will like her very much, she is such a straight, honest & womanly nature! — She and Elisabeth send you their fondest love! From there I flew to the regiment & sat for 3 hours at the examinations of the non-commissioned officers — and then hardly understanding anything more I ran about through our future apartments in the Winter palace (a killing sight), returned home for 5 minutes & drove to Ella. We two dined together, as the others were out: & she (the poor governess) had to sit in doors with a sore throat & a rotten eye — precisely the same story as Missy & Nando at Coburg. Ella gave me some excellent idea's about arranging our rooms — & we talked away till 11. I was glad to see her as of all the sisters she reminds me mostly of my sweet darling. Isn't it so?
Tomorrow morning I have still got a couple of hours work in the regiment — and then return to Гатчина — all the inspections after winter being terminated!
Above: Nicholas and Alix.
Note: ramoli = weakened, depleted.
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