Friday, December 31, 2021

Nicholas's letter to Alix, dated May 10/22, 1894

Sources:

Alexandra Feodorovna: Diaries and Correspondence, volume 2: Engagement and Marriage, 1894, pages 73 to 75, by George Hawkins, 2023








The letter:

Мая 10/22 1894. Гатчина.
№ 20.
Милая моя чудная душка Аликс,
Здравствуй! Мне очень скучно без тебя! Я тебя бесконечно люблю и ужасно хотел-бы тебя поцеловать! — There! That is a little punishment for my sweety, as I have waited the whole day, but alas! all in vain, for a letter to come. It is not enough for me reading over your old letters, I know them by heart nearly to the last word — now I want a new letter every day from my girly-dear! Now sweety I must scold a little: would you believe — I have not got the slightest idea of where you are or what you are about doing? Naughty — very naughty! All my combination's have failed of giving me the clear answers to the questions above!

It is Tuesday today: you were to leave Windsor & go with Granny to Manchester — so she told me in her last letter — and then?!!!! either — you would push on to Balmoral (that I knew you had no plans for), or — go to Walton to Victoria — or else — go at once to that bathing-place. How do you want me to know or guess the way you took after separating with Granny? There is a very quick & short way of communicating with people wh. is called - telegraph. Why didn't my naughty little owl use it & wire a few words to the distressed cow. I also wanted to telegraph to you this morning, but then I saw it was too late — asking you what were your plans & not even knowing where you were? I addressed my 19th letter to Walton & the books with the royal messenger also — hoping that Victoria alone might get them out of a muddle & send them wherever you might be at that time! Pfui! schämen sie sich altes aber doch geliebtes Viechen! — Mamma's old lady who keeps her jewels begs me to copy out this — what she asks you for: "Prière d'envoyer la mesure de devant de jupe (oh! shocking!) pour costumes russes et échantillons de velours pour deux costumes russes.

Sont déjà commandés:
Traine en drap d'argent.
"en velours saphir.
en moire blanc.
en tulle lauré et roses."

2) I learnt lately that she & Orchie have had a lovely correspondence on that subject & it appears that the latter did not hide her discontent at never seing you anymore. I find that a capital joke, those two writing to each other about us & behind our backs! — Granny wrote me a charming letter speaking chiefly about you my little girl, but in the end she gave me a hint that it was a sacrifice she was making, in allowing you to go so far away (3 days by rail). Well! does'n't she consider it also a great sacrifice on our side to be separated only that you might spend the summer with her, the dear old soul! Else the owl & the cow would have been quite free to choose & stay where they liked — either at Marlb. House - or Walton — or Wolfsgarten? Don't you think it is a sacrifice - darling? But then the reward shall be a sweet one — when we meet again! I get quite hot in the face when I think of the moment when I shall be able to clasp my beloved sweet little bride to my heart! Since tomorrow the time shall pass quicker for me as I am going to the camp & I am trying to hurry it on as I can. Every evening, when I am in bed I read two of your little verses you wrote in the little psalm book (german) and that makes me slumber off peacefully. All your dear photos & groups simply fill up my table, so that I have got hardly any place to move my hands & get cramps while writing. In town my table is bigger — it is going to Krasnoe — so I shall have more room — or rather I shall put still more photos & then be happy! —

I must leave Gatchina at 7.0 in the morning, as the battalion is ordered to leave its barracks at 8.30. We then proceed to the station & shall be dragged along Heaven knows how infinitely much slower than the slowest "bummelzug" and about 12. we may hope to arrive at Krasnoe, where we need only 20 minutes' marching fr. the station to the camp. Today it has been blowing & raining the whole day, quite like it did at Coburg with a few exceptions! Of course we walked, because we are made of sugar. Do you remember that, eh? But you must go on writing to Gatchina. If you think I know more of yr. address at the end of this letter than I did in the beginning — you are deeply mistaken. If it is lost — it is not my fault!

And now good-night my own beloved sweet little Alix. God bless you +.
A tender kiss fr. yr. ever loving & faithful unto death — old Nicky


Above: Nicholas and Alix.

Notes: "Здравствуй! Мне очень скучно без тебя! Я тебя бесконечно люблю и ужасно хотел-бы тебя поцеловать!" = "Hello! I am very bored without you! I love you endlessly and would terribly like to kiss you!"

"Pfui! schämen sie sich altes aber doch geliebtes Viechen!" = "Faugh! be ashamed of your old but beloved little cow!"

Prière d'envoyer la mesure de devant de jupe pour costumes russes et échantillons de velours pour deux costumes russes. Sont déjà commandés: Traine en drap d'argent, en velours saphir, en moire blanc, en tulle lauré et roses. = Request to send the skirt front measurement for Russian costumes and velvet samples for two Russian costumes. Already ordered: Train in silver cloth, sapphire velvet, white moire, lauré tulle and roses.

Bummelzug = commuter train.

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