Sources:
Letters of the Tsaritsa to the Tsar, 1914-1916, published by Duckworth & Co., 1923
The letters:
No. 93.
Tsarskoje Selo, June 22-nd 1915
My own beloved One,
I wonder how you got to Bielovezh & whether the weather is as beautiful as here. — So you have put off your return back — well, nothing is to be done; — if you could at least profit & see some troops. Cant you flie off again, as tho' to Bielovezh but go another way, without telling anybody. — Nikolasha need neither know, nor my enemy Dzhunkovsky. Ah dear, he is not an honest man, he has shown that vile, filthy paper (against our Friend) to Dmitri who repeated all to Paul & he to Alia. Such a sin, & as tho' you had said to him, that you have had enough of these dirty stories & wish him to be severely punished.
You see how he turns your words & orders round — the slanderers were to be punished & not he — & that at the Headquarters one wants him to be got rid of (this I beleive) — ah, its so vile — always liars, enemies — I long knew Dzhunkovsky hates Gregory & that the "Preobrazhensky" clique therefore dislikes me, as through me & Ania he comes to the house.
In winter Dzhunkovsky showed this paper to Voyeikov asking him to give it over to you & he refused doing anything so disgusting, thats why he hates Voyeikov & sticks with Drenteln I am sorry to say these things, but they are bitter truth, & now Samarin added to the lot — no good can come out of it.
If we let our Friend be persecuted we & our country shall suffer for it — once a year ago one tried to kill him & one has slandered him enough. As if they would not have called the police straight in to catch him in the act — such a horror! Speak, please to Voyeikov about it, I wish him to know Dzhunkovsky's behaviour & false using of yr. words. Voyeikov not a fool, without mentioning names can find out more about it. It dare not be spoken about. I don't know how Stcherbatov will act — probably also against our Fr. therefore against us. — And the Duma dare not broach this subject when they meet — Loman says they will, so as to force one to get rid of Gregory & Ania, I am so weary, such heartache & pain fr. all this — the idea of dirt being again spread about one we venerate is more than horrible.
Ah my Love, when at last will you thump with your hand upon the table & scream at Dzhunkovsky & others when they act wrongly — one does not fear you — & one must — they must be frightened of you, otherwise all sit upon us, & its enough Deary — don't let me speak in vain. If Dzhunkovsky is with you, call him, tell him you know (no names) he has shown that paper in town & that you order him to tear it up & not to dare to speak of Gregory as he does & that he acts as a traitor & not as a devoted subject, who ought to stand up for the Friends of his Sovereign, as one does in every other country. Oh my Boy, make one tremble before you — to love you is not enough, one must be affraid of hurting, displeasing you. You are always too kind & all profit. It cannot go on like that Deary, beleive me once, its honest truth I speak. All, who really love you, long that you should be more decided & show your displeasure stronger, be more severe — things cant go well so. If your Ministers feared you, all would be better. The old man, Goremykin also finds you ought to be more sure of yourself & energetically speak, & show more strongly when you are displeased. — How much one hears complaints against the Headquarters, these surrounding Nikolasha.
Now another affair — don't know how to explain it well, wont mention names, so as that nobody should suffer. — The "Erivantzi" are perfect — where there is a difficult place — one sends them & keeps them to the last, as one is so sure of them. Now one intends taking of their own officers & putting them into other regiments to make those better. This is quite wrong & breaks their hearts. If you take their old ones away, then the regiment will no longer be what it was. They have lost enough killed, wounded (made prisoners) & cannot spare their own. Please do not let the regiment thus be ruined, & leave those officers, they love their regiment & keep up its fame. One does it with other officers of the 2-nd Brigade & they fear their turn is coming too & it worries the Commander & all — but they dare not say anything, have no right — therefore they want their chief to know it, & not to allow their Veteran officers to be taken fr. them into other regiments. "We shall be able to stand up for the country's cause in the ranks of our own regiments, we will not waver about sacrificing our lives for it. This is so urgent a situation that one must hurry if our own nest is not to be broken up. I think that the regiment has some right to claim such attention (not like the others), for its fighting service in the past, and as to the present, the order to the Division is eloquent enough. All the brunt of the rearguard battles, from the 31-st of May to the 6-th of June were carried by its shoulders, which has been recognized at the top."
Only do not let Nikolasha or others guess that the regiment asks this, otherwise they will suffer for it. — Do try & do something & give me an answer, they are very anxious — one sent a delightful pettyoffice fr. there with a letter here. Must end, man waits. Blessings & kisses without end fr. own
Wify.
Ania kisses your hand. — Excuse beastly dull letter
...
No. 94.
Tsarskoje Selo, June 22-nd 1915
My very own beloved One,
The letter I wrote in such haste to-day, I fear will have caused you little pleasure & I regret, that I had no time to add nothing nice.
It was a joy to get your telegram from Bielovezh — I am sure it did you good seeing the splendid forest — but yet a sad feeling seeing the old places & realising that now a terrible war is raging not so very far off from that peaceful place. —
This morning I went in my "droshki" with Alexei to our hospital & we remained there over two hours. Spoke to the wounded, sat in the hospital embroidering & then in the garden whilst the others played croquet. But my heart felt bad & ached so — too early probably for such a visit yet — but I was so glad to see them all. Kolenkin turned up after commanding the "Alexandrovtzi" only a month, he had to come away because of terrible abscesses in the ear — they burst the drum of the ear too, so he hears nothing on the left ear, poor fellow. —
I had Rostoftzev for an hour & a half talking over the store of Mme Sakhomlinov — all is arranging itself satisfactorily & without any scandal. — To-morrow I shall receive Polivanov — Stcherbatov leaves very great freedom to the press — Maklakov was far severer, but now the result is one speaks & gets too excited about the Duma wh. is not a good thing. —
One longs sometimes to go to sleep & to awake when all will be over & peace once more reign everywhere — external & internal. —
Everywhere Samarin's name is already mentioned — so disagreable before his nomination comes out — how that fills me, with deepest anxiety. I fear I aggravate you by all I write, but its only honestly & well meant, Sweetheart — others will never say anything, so old wify writes her opinion frankly, when she feels its right to do so. One longs to help keeping of any disaster, but often ones words, alas, come too late, when already nothing can be done. Now I must try & sleep, its late. God bless yr. slumber, send you rest & strength, courage & energy, calm and wisdom. —
June 23-rd. Just got the report of my "Alexandrovtzi" you kindly sent me — thanks Deary, even an envelope is a nice thing to receive with sweet handwriting upon it. — I remain quiet to-day, as heart again enlarged, pulse rather weak & head aches.
Am lying on the balkony — all are out & away & Ania gone to Peterhof.
I enclose a letter from Victoria wh. you may like to read.
Css. Hohenfelsen wrote to A. asking, whether she thinks we & the children would have accepted a luncheon at their house after Church — on Paul's namesday, with the people living in their house & whomsoever we wld. wish. I told her to answer (this was to be found out in case of a refusal, so that it should not follow upon a regular invitation), that I do not know when you return & that my heart troubling me again it is doubtful I could sit at a big luncheon. So foolish & tactless to ask. If we liked we might call upon him to congratulate — but not like this, with Babake & Olga Kreutz, & the Countess! —
Sweetheart, me is so lonely without you, agoo wee one! —
Goodbye Lovebird, I bless & kiss you with fervour & great love. — Hope so much to go Friday evening to Holy Communion, if well enough, otherwise one of the last days of this Lent. — Wonder what you have settled for the day of the cross, hope you have said its to be done by your order. —
God bless & protect you, I cover you with kisses,
Ever yr. own old
Sunny.
Love to old Man & N. P. —
Nicholas's telegram:
Telegram. Beloveje. 22 June, 1915.
I have arrived here all right. I remember; am thinking of you all. The forest is beautiful. I embrace you closely.
Nicky.
Above: Nicholas and Alexandra.
Above: Grigori Rasputin.
Note: Alexandra often referred to Grigori Rasputin as "our Friend".
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