Sources:
A Lifelong Passion, letters and diary entries compiled by Andrei Maylunas and Sergei Mironenko
George Hawkins at Letters and writings of Nicholas II and his family on Facebook
The letter:
My own beloved sweet Angel,
Once more you leave your old Wify, but this time with a precious little son in her arms, who must comfort her heavy heart.
It is hard to part again, but thank God not for long — how happy the Cossacks will be to see you, more so than ever, as now our precious tiny is a new link between their former Ataman and themselves. I am sure Moscow will be excited when you pass. The nights will be so long and dreary.
I love to look at you when I cannot sleep and the room begins to get light. I am sure you will feel sad leaving your little family and new born son — we shall count the hours till you return. I'll try to be brave, but my stupid nerves are still so weak that it's more than I can do to keep those old tears back. Oh, how I love you!!! God alone knows how much.
I hope and trust that no bad news from the east will come whilst we are separated — and don't like your hearing all when I am not with you. Oh God is indeed good having sent in this sunbeam now, when we all need it so much, may He give us the force to bring Baby up well — and to be a real help and comrade to you when he is big.
Sweet One, goodbye and God bless and keep you and bring you quickly and safely back to me again. My earnest prayers and thoughts will never leave you. I cover your sweet face with loving tender kisses — Ever your Wify,
Alix
The letter in full:
No. 189
Петергофъ
Абг 1904 г
My own beloved sweet Angel,
Once more you leave yr old wify, but this time with a precious little son in her arms, who must comfort her heavy heart.
It's hard to part again, but thank God not for long. How happy the Cossacks will be to see you, more so than ever as now one precious tiny is a new link between their former Ataman and Themselves.
I am sure Moscou will be excited when you pass.
The nights will be so long and dreary. I love to look at you when I cannot sleep and the room begins to get light. I am sure you will feel sad leaving yr little family and new born son, we shall count the hours till your return. I'll try to be brave but my stupid nerves are still so weak that it's more than I can do to keep those old tears back. Oh, how I love you. God alone knows how much.
I hope and trust that no bad news fr the east will come whilst we are separated and don't like yr hearing all when I am not with you.
Николаша's presence will be nice and you can talk of ___ when you feel sad. When he returns, we must show him at Petiusha our wee treasure.
Oh God is indeed good in having sent in this sunbeam now, when all need it so much, may He give us the force to bring Baby up well and to be a real help and comrad to you when he is big.
Sweet One, goodbye and God bless and keep you and bring you quickly and safely back to me again. My earnest prayers and thoughts will never leave you. I cover your sweet face with loving, tender kisses.
Wify
Above: Alexandra with Alexei, year 1904. Photo courtesy of Ilya Grigoryev on Flickr.
Note: ___ = "This is like[ly] a reference to Monsieur Philippe".
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