Sources:
Alexandra Feodorovna: Diaries and Correspondence, volume 2: Engagement and Marriage, 1894, pages 177 to 179, by George Hawkins, 2023
George Hawkins at Letters and writings of Nicholas II and his family on Facebook
The letter excerpt:
Thora is on deck being swung by Dr Woods on a little swing they hang up on purpose for her. The Island looks lovely to-day. How I miss you is not to be described, how mad we were that day and when you lay smoking on Granny's bed. Thora told it Admiral Fullerton and he roared. Schneiderlein and Gretchen are with us... The sea is like a looking glass — if it is only so on Tuesday it will be delightful. What fun we might have had were you here. I cannot enjoy myself properly without you, tho' I had to laugh before. We were up on the bridge and the wind wld catch under Thora's dress and blow it up so that she looked impossible and did not know how to move.
The letter in full:
No. 53
July 27th 1894
Душки Ники,
I am down below in the cabin where the piano is — this time it is open and there are tables with writing materials. To my joy I am going to have yr cabin — my name is already put in the place near the door. I shall kiss the name a certain person wrote and where he placed a kiss. I hope it will make me dream of you. Our party only consists of four as the others we had asked rebelled the last moment as they were afraid it might be ruff — nonsense, as there is no motion at all.
Thora is on deck being swung by Dr Woods on a little swing they hang up on purpose for her. The Island looks lovely to-day. How I miss you is not to be described, how mad we were that day and when you lay smoking on Granny's bed. Thora told it Admiral Fullerton and he roared. Schneiderlein and Gretchen are with us.
Fancy, one of the poor men of the explosion last week was swamped up near the yacht yesterday and he is now lying where the poor others were. It is too sad! The sea is like a looking glass — if it is only so on Tuesday it will be delightful. What fun we might have had were you here. I cannot enjoy myself properly without you, tho' I had to laugh before. We were up on the bridge and the wind wld catch under Thora's dress and blow it up so that she looked impossible and did not know how to move. We are going to have tea up there afterwards. We lunched at ¼ to 1 before coming on board. Schneiderlein grumbles because I did not learn properly to-day, my head is ramolie and empty, only one picture is in it. Whose?
Here I am home again. I have been rubbing Thora as poor Child had such a bad headache. Our trip was nice, the air so lovely but I could not help feeling depressed without you. I miss you too dreadfully my beloved sweet darling. I am going to rest now a bit and then shall continue before going to bed. "Loin des yeux mais près du coeur" "I love thee, I love thee, that's all I can say, it is my dreaming in the night, my vision in the day, the very echo of my heart, the blessing when I pray."
We had Lady's Dinner (dull) and then played duets of course. I can't write much to-day as I have such neuralgia and my right eye is fast closing. Lovy sweet, God bless you. Your little girly misses you badly and the evenings, how gently my poor tired Darling slept that night, I longed to keep you clasped in my arms and to have watched over you, but yr old man would have been too greatly shocked and who knows whom you might have met in the morning then.
Granny heard from Charlotte — she suffers from headaches, ever since she was thrown out of the carriage and is therefore going for a change of air to the Norderney. My Gentleman had concussion of the brain, but the ladies did not suffer in any way.
Now good night sweety, sleep well and dream of your forlorn spitzbub who is anxiously awaiting a letter from darling lausbub by to-morrow morning's post.
28th. Good morning. My hair is being done and I must finish this letter quickly as we are going to Ryde at 10.30 to be photographed. I hope they will succeed as then I shall send you some immediately and those of the other day I hope are at last finished. A good kiss for yr dear telegram I received this morning, it looks too mad in this impossible language.
It is 10 and I must dress and be off to breakfast otherwise Granny is sure to be there before me. Hang that clock striking, og dear, and my hair is not finished.
Schneiderlein will address this. A good kiss. Ever yr own deeply loving and ever faithful bridy
Alix
God bless you, sweety.
Above: Alix.
Above: Nicholas.
Above: Alix's cousin Princess Helena Victoria of Schleswig-Holstein, known within the family as Thora.
Notes: "Душки Ники" = "Darling Nicky".
ramolie = exhausted.
"Loin des yeux mais près du coeur" = "Out of sight, but close to the heart".
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