Sunday, November 24, 2019

Alexandra's letter to a sister, dated December 10, 1894

The newly wed Alexandra wrote this letter to one of her sisters on December 10, 1894.

Source:

The Life and Tragedy of Alexandra by Baroness Sophie Buxhoeveden.

Chapter 5, Marriage and First Year in Russia, 1894-1895

http://www.alexanderpalace.org/2006alix/chapter_V.html

https://archive.org/details/lifetragedyofale00sofi/page/44

The letter:

PALAIS ANICHKOV
December 10th, 1894

The ceremony in church reminded me so much of '84, only both our fathers were missing — that was fearful — no kiss, no blessing from either. But I cannot speak about that day nor of all the sad ceremonies before. One's feelings you can imagine. One day in deepest mourning, lamenting a beloved one, the next in smartest clothes being married. There cannot be a greater contrast, but it drew us more together, if possible. Aunt Minny is so sweet and patient in her great grief. She touches one with her gentleness. To-day was again a hard day, the fortieth day at the fortress. We two have just now been for five days at Tsarskoe, alone with a lady and gentleman, the rest and quiet did one good. We walked and drove and enjoyed the beautiful country air. Here we get out but little, as Nicky sees people almost all day and then has to read through his papers and to write. Only tea we have together, all the other meals upstairs with the rest. I cannot yet realize that I am married, living here with the others, it seems like being on a visit. The rooms are quite comfortable: Nicky's old ones and two others with nice light furniture and chintzes we chose. We are trying to make designs for our rooms at the Winter Palace. My two new ladies seem nice — the young one is C. Lamsdorff's sister.

It was horrid saying good-bye to the dear ones when they left again for home — poor Gretchen! But one must not think of that. For my Nicky's sake I must be good, so as to cheer him up.

If I only could find words to tell you of my happiness daily it grows more and my love greater. Never can I thank God enough for having given me such a treasure. He is too good, dear, loving, and kind, and his affection for his mother is touching, and how he looks after her, so quietly and tenderly.


Above: Nicholas and Alexandra in their wedding ceremony.



Above: The newly widowed Marie Feodorovna, Nicholas's mother and Alexandra's mother-in-law, mourning her now deceased husband, Tsar Alexander III.

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