Sources:
Alexandra Feodorovna: Diaries and Correspondence, volume 2: Engagement and Marriage, 1894, pages 34 to 36, by George Hawkins, 2023
George Hawkins at Letters and writings of Nicholas II and his family on Facebook
The letter excerpt:
... we went to Georgie and May, and from there to Kensington Palace to Aunt Louise who was in bed. She showed me "the" dogs and we laughed over the sundry telegrams, and then Uncle Lorne appeared with a sweet one wh he presented to me as a congratulation. Was it not kind of him? Orchie will no doubt be furious and more so as it is a baby. If only nothing happens to it as usually something has to creatures belonging to me...
The letter in full:
No. 9
Buckingham Palace
May 10th 1894
My own sweet Nicky,
When still in bed this morning, your dear, long letter was brought to me, it is such a joy receiving it, I don't know how often I have not already read through your letters every night before I go to sleep. What pretty verses you wrote for me, I wonder where you got them from.
Well, our theatre was a success and we laughed a great deal, but I felt so lonely without you, and could not therefore enjoyed it too much. Louise, Macduff, Toria and Maud sat in a little box opposite to us and I saw them in fits. I am going to them with Sandra at 5, as they are not going to the drawing room and Thora has to go in their stead. She and I payed Aunt Marie a visite and I greeted smiling Schusäutzehen with joy, but it made a lump come into my throat as it reminded me so painfully of the Schloss at Coburg and I longed for you ever so much. Aunt Marie has kindly asked me to spend a few days with her when Uncle is in Vienna for the Wedding, and Victoria and Ludwig are also going to live with her. It will be delightful.
Then, all in pouring rain mind you, we went to Georgie and May, and from there to Kensington Palace to Aunt Louise who was in bed. She showed me "the" dog, and we laughed over the sundry telegrams, and then Uncle Lorne appeared with a sweet one wh he presented to me as a congratulation. Was it not kind of him? Orchie will no doubt be furious and more so as it is a baby! If only nothing happens to it as usually something has to creatures belonging to me.
Now it has cleared up and the sun is shining, all the people are driving about, dressed up in the drawing room.
I have bought a little cross dear, like Toria's you gave me, and I am going to wear it till we meet, will you take it then and wear it for your own little girl's sake?
Serge photographed Frl. Schneider left yesterday for Darmstadt, so I suppose she will be turning up Sunday or Monday, how industrious I shall have to be then, all teaze me about my Russian lessons, if only I can manage to speak it a little bit decently that you don't roar at me or have to shut your ears.
There — now it is pouring again, as tho' it had never done so before — too aggravating! I just looked out of the window and saw Uncle Christian todling through the mud. I shall send this letter off when I have seen the Cousins, as I may have more to tell you then as I fear this letter is very dull and I don't want to bore my own precious darling boysy dear, мирли мой.
It is pouring in deluges so that the room is getting quite dark, to shocking what the place looks like, the rain being blown across the street and crowds with their umbrellas up and the drawing room carriages all standing up in a row. Poor creatures, they will be like drowned rats in no time if it continues so.
And what has been settled about Xenia and Sandro? Are they still offended that one talks more about you than them? Give them my love, will you! But they ought to be contented as since they are engaged they have not been separated, and we have already over a week and are to continue so over a month — why it is really maddening, grumbling does no good, only it relieves one so.
There's the sun appearing. It [illegible] — regular April showers, too funny. If you were not such an old Spötter, I should tell you that I am reading a most amusing Italian story, but you are a beast and always laugh at poor me. You ought to be ashamed of yourself! I am sure my "Coburg friend" would be more lenient than you, don't you think so too?
Now sweety, I must be off and wash those dirty paws of mine and then lunch with Granny. Here I am again. I spent a delightful hour with the dear Cousins. I enclose a line from Toria. I fear some of the relations have not made very kind remarks to her about yr going to marry, whether she is not angry or jealous, how cruel and tactless to say such things, and then she is afraid I may believe what they say and go against her. There is no fear of it, the dear Child. I am so sorry I have in the last years seen so very little of them, as in consequence they imagined I had changed towards them and no longer cared for them. But you know Granny is funny and always was a little jealous of Aunt Alix and never would allow us to go to her. Uncle and Aunt feel rather grieved, well, so am I as really it would have been nice had I been with them here in town, as then they see no one and we might have had some nice talks. But perhaps when you come we might coax her to let us go away for three days or so to Aunt Alix.
My own sweet love how I long for you, oh, come, come to your little owl who feels so forlorn without you. So Toria gave you those pretty verses you wrote out for me, dear girl. They are dining here to-night, so I shall get a peep of them at least. Old Uncle George is coming also to-night. I am sure he will bellow nicely and say impossible things.
But sweety I must say Goodbye. God bless you, my own precious darling old Boysy.
Ever yr deeply devoted and tenderly loving little Girly
Alix
Many a fond kiss.
Above: Nicholas and Alix.
Above: Alix with Ara.
Notes: "мирли мой" = "my sweet".
Spötter = mocker.
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